Dear Christian Sisters,
It’s Valentine’s Day, and here in the USA we not only commercialize everything but we also get our belief systems from TV, movies, and the media.
As a result, many of us have a concept of love that is not biblical. For example, we say “making love” when we mean “having sex.”
We know from 1 Corinthians 13 what love is and is not. Sex is not mentioned at all.
So, on this Valentine’s Day, I want to share with you a bible teaching on sex.
My friend Katharine Wang, Founder of Master the Bible Ministries, has a wonderful teaching on sex and graciously wrote a guest blog for all of you. I pray that Katharine’s teaching blesses your understanding of how God sees sex.
Lord, open our minds to understanding the scriptures (Luke 24:45)—in Jesus’ name, Amen!
3 Things about Sex that Nobody Talks About
by Katharine Wang, Founder of Master the Bible Ministries
Sex is everywhere you turn in our culture. There’s no easy way—well, really no way—to avoid sexual temptation. It’s calling to us on every corner.
So what do you do when you start getting pressure to have sex before marriage or to look at or listen to sexually explicit stuff?
Before doing something you can never take back, there are three things you should know about sex that nobody talks about.
But first, we need a little sex education from the One who designed sex.
Sex & Our Bodies, Souls, and Spirits
Sex impacts three parts of us—our bodies, our souls (our emotions and mind), and our spirits.
God designed sex to create a physical, emotional, and spiritual connection for us. Anytime we engage in sex—or even think about it or look at something that arouses those desires within us, those three areas are triggered.
When we engage in sex as God designed it—in marriage to one person of the other gender—it gives life to our bodies, souls, and spirits.
Marital Sex & Good Health
Sex in marriage actually makes us healthier. It decreases stress levels, which makes us less likely to get sick. It creates an emotional bond with our spouse.
But more than that, it actually expands the capacity we have within us to have deeper emotional connections with anyone.
And it gives us a spiritual connection—not just to our spouse but to God and to others, too. It deepens our capacity to relate to people spiritually.
Extra-Marital Sex & Sickness
But what happens when we engage in sex-related things not how God designed us to do it? Sex still impacts our bodies, souls, and spirits.
Instead of making us healthier, sex outside God’s design opens us up to illness. Any sin will open our bodies to getting sick.
Numerous medical studies have documented the connection between illness and things like stress, anger, and even unforgiveness.
When it comes to sexual sin, doctors have an entire category of illnesses caused by these temptations.
Maybe you had heard that one. But here are three more things about sex that nobody talks about.
1. When Sex Can Make You Stupid and Feel Alone
First, giving in to sexual temptation numbs our conscious faster and in a more deadly way than a lot of other things.
You’re no longer as sensitive as you were before to the difference between truth and error, good and bad. That causes you to make more blunders, bad choices, and poor judgments in life.
2. When Sex Can Make It Harder to Relate Normally
Second, certain sexual sins will block your ability to relate normally to people of the other gender. It becomes hard to see them as anything but an object of your pleasure. That robs you of deep relationships that God designed your soul to have.
It’s harder to make deep connections with people. You may feel empty, lonely, disconnected—almost like the walking dead. Relationships can become more shallow and more focused on what people can do for you rather than being focused on deep and satisfying mutuality.
You may find yourself less and less fulfilled with your relationships because you’re losing the capacity for satisfaction through relationships.
3. When Sex Can Make It Harder to Form Spiritual Connections
Third, giving into sexual temptation shrinks your capacity for deep spiritual connection with others and with God. It becomes harder to perceive what God is communicating to you. You may feel disconnected to God or like he’s being silent or hard to find.
And you may find it harder to have deep, satisfying spiritual connections with other people.
God’s Purposeful Design
Sex was designed by God to expand and bring life to our bodies, souls, and spirits. When we engage in sex as intended, we see our health and capacity for deep connections grow in all those areas.
But when we give in to sexual temptation, we will be impacted in all three areas of our being.
Maybe you’re experiencing some of the negative things that can happen when we give into sexual temptation. God will completely heal, forgive, and restore when you reach out to him.
But why be the one that needs healing? Use sex to help you—in your marriage with your spouse—not to bring you down.