Listen to Alyssa Milano

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

On Sunday, Alyssa Milano told her abortion story on her podcast. Some news outlets reported on it, including the LA Times, Us Weekly, and FOX.

Rather than getting mad at her for justifying what she did (for I, too, had an abortion), let’s read what Alyssa actually said (which I transcribed from her podcost):

I was on the pill, taking birth control, because I knew that I was not ready to be a parent… Also, at that time, I was taking a drug called Accutane. Accutane is an acne medicine that is so likely to cause birth defects if taken by a pregnant woman that the FDA now requires doctors, pharmacists, and women to sign up to a registry before dispensing it. So using contraception was doubly important to me.

And I still got pregnant.

It was devastating. I was raised Catholic and was suddenly put in conflict with my faith, faith I was coming to realize empowered only men to make every single decision about what was allowed and what was not allowed…

I chose to have an abortion I chose. It was my choice. And it was absolutely the right choice for me. It was not an easy choice. It was not something I wanted, but it was something that I needed, like most health care is.

I refuse to let anyone else’s bullshit morality force me into a life of premarital celibacy. I refuse to live in the narrative that sexual pleasure is for men and that women exist to deliver that pleasure. My body gives me pleasure. Sexually connecting with my partner gave me pleasure. No one would say that he was at fault for enjoying sex with me, but you can be damn sure that the men enacting these laws think less of me for deriving the same pleasure from him…

They tell you that the pill is 99% effective at preventing pregnancies and yet [here, she let’s out a big sigh] a few months later, I found out that I was pregnant again. So, I had done what I knew to do to prevent pregnancy and was still pregnant. So once again, I made the right decision to end that pregnancy…

The assault against women’s bodies has forced me to reflect on what I would’ve lost if I never had my abortions. I would not have my children… I would not have my career… I would never have met my amazing husband David… I would never have been free to be myself… That’s what this freedom is about: freedom. Freedom from oppression. Freedom for women to have the audacity to be equally sexual beings as men. freedom for women to live the life they were meant to have not just the life that is thrust upon them by a pregnancy that cannot exist in their life.

Listening to Alyssa tell her story is heartbreaking for me because…

  • I hear the pain in her voice.
  • I hear her regret for being pregnant and her regret of being faced with a choice.
  • I hear her anger toward patriarchy and inequality and hypocrisy.
  • I hear her heartbreak that she was twice in the 1% of birth control failure when she expected to be in the 99%.
  • I hear the anger for Christianity, which she sees as favoring men.

It’s heartbreaking to hear because I once thought like she does.

Regret about Pregnancy

I remember that I was more upset about being pregnant and having to choose than I was about the abortion itself. I blamed everyone else for my pregnancy rather than taking responsibility for choosing to have sex, which exists for procreation (whether you believe in creationism or evolution).

So, I was mad that sex did what it was supposed to do—make babies.

Do you hear that from Alyssa, too? What does that tell you about our sex education programs?

Inequality & Hypocrisy

When I hear Alyssa’s anger at inequality and hypocrisy, I want to cheer her on! Why? Because men are historically seen as studs when they get women pregnant, but women pregnant out-of-wedlock have been seen as whores. That hypocrisy makes me mad.

The reality is that men can have sex with multiple women with little consequence compared to the consequences for women. Women are at much higher risk for STIs/STDs because they are on the receiving end.

Women are the ones who get pregnant while men can walk away—and many men do, and many men have. Then the woman has to find him and fight for financial support.

If he’s not a nice guy, then she has to hide to protect herself and her child.

If she’s not interested in him any more, then she doesn’t want a child to keep her forever connected to him.

For the pro-choice movement, abortion is an equality issue. Alyssa says it in her podcast. The guests she quoted in her podcast say it. Can you see why?

Men have hurt women. Men have a reputation for hurting women, not protecting them.

So, when Alyssa and others in the pro-choice movement see male legislators writing anti-abortion laws, she does not see them as protecting her but as hurting her in yet another way.

What’s the answer?

One answer is for men to improve their reputation.

Oh, how I would like to hear a male, pro-life politician apologize for all the men who have not stood up to their responsibilities and to call for men to do better.

Men who are good men need to be mentoring other men—of every age. They need to be good dads to their sons and daughters. They need to teach their sons and especially their daughters what to look for in a spouse and what to watch out for when dating.

Women who are married to good men need to be heralding their husbands to their children and their friends publicly so that society hears that there are good men out there.

I’ll start! Russ is an awesome provider who would never run away from his children. Actually, Russ would have chosen to stop after our first was born because he felt too old to have our second one, but he never considered aborting. Today, our second boy is a chip off the old block. They truly enjoy their relationship.

(Follow Love Harder Marriage Coaching for more positive stories about husbands and fathers.)

Equality or Bondage?

The irony is that Alyssa and my former self see premarital sex and abortion as an equality issue, but I now see premarital sex and abortion as a bondage issue.

Roe v Wade was decided by men. What does legalized abortion allow? It allows men to have more extra-marital sex without consequences of providing for their children.

  • The baby daddy is the number one influence on a woman’s choice to abort.
  • Fathers, even Christian fathers, bring their daughters to abortion clinics.
  • Abusers bring women to abortion clinics.
  • Men bring their underage girlfriends to abortion clinics.
  • Sex traffickers bring women to abortion clinics.

That’s not equity. That’s bondage.

If we want abortion to be unthinkable, then we need to be talking to men, influencing men, to do better. I’m a mother of two boys. I’m starting at home.

Hollywood

Here’s another irony in what Alyssa has to say. At the time of her abortions, Alyssa was on the “women-empowering” show Charmed. She was one of three female stars of the TV series, which was created by a woman.

If Hollywood executives had written her out of the series for being pregnant, wouldn’t we have screamed women’s oppression? and inequality in the workplace?

Alyssa’s boyfriend/fiance—whom she did not call out, but I will: Scott Wolf—certainly had the money to support their child. She had enough money to raise their child or to put their baby up for adoption. So what was the concern?

The concern is that Alyssa’s career would’ve been ruined.

Don’t be surprised by this. Hollywood was paying for / providing abortions to actresses long before Roe v Wade.

Further, Lisa Whelchel, a Christian, who was on the TV show “The Facts of Life” (1979-88) talked about how she was given a scale and expected to weigh in every day. Skinniness is not just expected but demanded in Hollywood. Pregnancy messes that up.

In contrast, Gal Gadot, who played “Wonder Woman” in the recent DC Extended Universe movie, filmed several scenes while pregnant. Note that she had a female director.

But I wonder if Alyssa has ever talked to Taraji P Henson, who didn’t let her toddler or her status as a single mother stop her from becoming a multiple award winning actress.

“What if I believed those people who told me when I became pregnant in college that I wouldn’t finish? I walked across that stage with my son on my hip.” ~Taraji P. Henson, “Empire” and “Hidden Figures”

1% not 99%

I hear Alyssa upset that both of her unwanted pregnancies were from the 1% ineffectiveness of the pill.

This makes me wonder if Alyssa ever took math. I wonder if so many people in the pro-choice movement took math. I wonder how I was so blind when I was pro-choice.

The thinking is that we did everything to prevent pregnancy, so why are we pregnant? But we didn’t do everything to prevent pregnancy because if we had, we wouldn’t be pregnant. What? What’s that? It’s called abstinence.

Women and men, don’t be surprised if you’re having sex and get pregnant. It’s called biology.

Patriarchy & the Church

Did you notice that Alyssa looks at the Catholic church, and therefore the Pope, as male oppression? The same could be said of Protestant churches that do not allow female pastors. This is certainly how I felt.

Again, I find this ironic, because if Christians were actually not having sex outside of marriage, then Alyssa wouldn’t think that what Pope Paul VI said in Humanae Vitae (1968) or what Pope John Paul II said in Theology of the Body (1979-1984) favored men rather than women.

And no, I’m not Catholic.

When the Holy Spirit first tapped on my shoulder (on my first Uganda mission trip) about speaking boldly about abortion, I had just said to two male pastors, “Women don’t want to hear this message from men. You don’t understand. There’s no way you can understand. Women need to hear from women.”

So, we women need to speak up. And when we do, we need to be clear that we have not been convinced by “male oppressors” but instead by scientific research.

And men, you need to talk to men because their influence is much larger than the pro-choice movement is willing to admit. Teach men to be men, to step up, to provide, to be responsible, to father well.

Sex is the responsibility of both men and women.

  • Both have a choice.
  • Both are smart enough to realize that even 1% ineffectiveness can result in pregnancy.
  • Both have a responsibility to provide for the child they helped to create.

Me Too, Alyssa. Sorry, Not Sorry.

Alyssa ended her podcast saying, “I, for one, will never stop using my voice. Sorry, not sorry.”

Yeah, me too, Alyssa—not that I have your pretty face, your slim figure, or your Hollywood credentials, for I am just a woman who listens to both sides, discusses rather than rants, reasons with others out of love rather than self-justification, and who votes her values.

I vote for abundant life not just for babies, but for women.

My body. My choice. It’s my body, and with it I will worship the Lord.

MybodyMyworshipBROWN

In Christ,

Cheryl

P.S. The video at the top of the FOX news article is from May 2019 and is demeaning—please don’t applaud FOX or Tucker Carlson for that awful interview with Mark Steyn. We don’t win this battle by belittling but through love.

3 Things about Sex that Nobody Talks About

Dear Christian Sisters,

It’s Valentine’s Day, and here in the USA we not only commercialize everything but we also get our belief systems from TV, movies, and the media.

As a result, many of us have a concept of love that is not biblical. For example, we say “making love” when we mean “having sex.”

We know from 1 Corinthians 13 what love is and is not. Sex is not mentioned at all.

So, on this Valentine’s Day, I want to share with you a bible teaching on sex.

My friend Katharine Wang, Founder of Master the Bible Ministries, has a wonderful teaching on sex and graciously wrote a guest blog for all of you. I pray that Katharine’s teaching blesses your understanding of how God sees sex.

Lord, open our minds to understanding the scriptures (Luke 24:45)—in Jesus’ name, Amen!

3 Things about Sex that Nobody Talks About

by Katharine Wang, Founder of Master the Bible Ministries

Sex is everywhere you turn in our culture. There’s no easy way—well, really no way—to avoid sexual temptation. It’s calling to us on every corner.

So what do you do when you start getting pressure to have sex before marriage or to look at or listen to sexually explicit stuff?

Before doing something you can never take back, there are three things you should know about sex that nobody talks about.

But first, we need a little sex education from the One who designed sex.

Sex & Our Bodies, Souls, and Spirits

Sex impacts three parts of us—our bodies, our souls (our emotions and mind), and our spirits.

God designed sex to create a physical, emotional, and spiritual connection for us. Anytime we engage in sex—or even think about it or look at something that arouses those desires within us, those three areas are triggered.

When we engage in sex as God designed it—in marriage to one person of the other gender—it gives life to our bodies, souls, and spirits.

Marital Sex & Good Health

Sex in marriage actually makes us healthier. It decreases stress levels, which makes us less likely to get sick. It creates an emotional bond with our spouse.

But more than that, it actually expands the capacity we have within us to have deeper emotional connections with anyone.

And it gives us a spiritual connection—not just to our spouse but to God and to others, too. It deepens our capacity to relate to people spiritually.

Extra-Marital Sex & Sickness

But what happens when we engage in sex-related things not how God designed us to do it? Sex still impacts our bodies, souls, and spirits.

Instead of making us healthier, sex outside God’s design opens us up to illness. Any sin will open our bodies to getting sick.

Numerous medical studies have documented the connection between illness and things like stress, anger, and even unforgiveness.

When it comes to sexual sin, doctors have an entire category of illnesses caused by these temptations.

Maybe you had heard that one. But here are three more things about sex that nobody talks about.

1. When Sex Can Make You Stupid and Feel Alone

First, giving in to sexual temptation numbs our conscious faster and in a more deadly way than a lot of other things.

You’re no longer as sensitive as you were before to the difference between truth and error, good and bad. That causes you to make more blunders, bad choices, and poor judgments in life.

2. When Sex Can Make It Harder to Relate Normally

Second, certain sexual sins will block your ability to relate normally to people of the other gender. It becomes hard to see them as anything but an object of your pleasure. That robs you of deep relationships that God designed your soul to have.

It’s harder to make deep connections with people. You may feel empty, lonely, disconnected—almost like the walking dead.  Relationships can become more shallow and more focused on what people can do for you rather than being focused on deep and satisfying mutuality.

You may find yourself less and less fulfilled with your relationships because you’re losing the capacity for satisfaction through relationships.

3. When Sex Can Make It Harder to Form Spiritual Connections

Third, giving into sexual temptation shrinks your capacity for deep spiritual connection with others and with God. It becomes harder to perceive what God is communicating to you. You may feel disconnected to God or like he’s being silent or hard to find.

And you may find it harder to have deep, satisfying spiritual connections with other people.

God’s Purposeful Design

Sex was designed by God to expand and bring life to our bodies, souls, and spirits. When we engage in sex as intended, we see our health and capacity for deep connections grow in all those areas.

But when we give in to sexual temptation, we will be impacted in all three areas of our being.

Maybe you’re experiencing some of the negative things that can happen when we give into sexual temptation. God will completely heal, forgive, and restore when you reach out to him.

But why be the one that needs healing? Use sex to help you—in your marriage with your spouse—not to bring you down.

I pray that Katharine’s teaching helps you understand God’s design for sex. You can find more great biblical teachings by Katharine Wang at the Master the Bible Ministries website.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Let’s Get Serious, Church: A Reaction to John Piper’s Post

Dear Christian Sisters,

I applaud every pastor who speaks about abortion. I am pleased that John Piper wrote a blog post about abortion and that his Desiring God ministry shared it on Facebook once again earlier this week on the anniversary of Roe v Wade.One Sanctity of Life sermon per year is not enough

However, we—The Church—have so much more to do.

I am a member of a big church with a famous pastor who is willing to speak against abortion on Sanctity of Life Sunday. I so appreciate his willingness to do so because so many pastors don’t or won’t.

Yet at the same time, I know that one 40-minute sermon once per year is not enough. About 30% of abortions in the United States are by Christian women. That’s 30% too many.

We have so much more that we need to do.

Sanctity of Life

What Do We Teach?

When our churches have classes and small groups, do they teach why abortion is a sin? Do they provide the bible verses that show that God knows all of us when we were formed in the womb? Do they teach the spiritual consequences of abortion?

To Whom Do We Teach?

Do we teach not just to teenagers but to the young adults and to the adults? Remember, everyone 64 and younger has known Roe v Wade their whole adult lives—and four states legalized abortion before Roe v Wade (Hawaii, New York, Oregon, and Alaska).

My church does not teach these things.

Sanctity of Sex

Most abortions could be eliminated simply by people waiting until they are married to have sex. Do the classes at our churches teach the sanctity of sex?

Do we teach sex education in our teen programs? Or do we leave sex education to our public schools?

Do we teach in our young adult or adult programs? Because, once again, our adults don’t even know—and many don’t practice—the sanctity of sex.

So, let’s get started. Pray, asking the Lord to start providing Sanctity of Life and Sanctity of Sex classes in your church to everyone—not just teens. Talk to other like-minded members about getting something started. Talk to your church leadership.

Let’s make the biblical teaching of abortion and sex normal in our churches. We need to end abortion in The Church. It’s up to us to make that happen.

In Christ,

Cheryl

MybodyMyworship on the Radio

Dear Christian Sisters,

A couple weeks ago, Katharine Wang of Master the Bible Ministries interviewed my friend Michele and me about our new ministry, MybodyMyworship.

You can listen to the recording below of the radio show or read the transcript.

MybodyMyworship battles abortion with worship, prayer, and teaching. Our mission is to inspire spiritual acts of worship (Romans 12:1) by teaching biblically sound science of sexual integrity and psychological effects of abortion (1 Corinthians 6:19).

We offer conferences full of worship, prayer, and teaching. Please contact us to bring MybodyMyworship to your church anywhere in the United States or around the world.

We also offer worship inspiration on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Follow us on social media to fill your social media feed with God.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Announcing MybodyMyworship!

Dear Christian Sisters,

I had the privilege of being interviewed on the radio about my new ministry, MybodyMyworship. When the audio recording becomes available, I’ll share it with you, but in the meantime, here is the transcript.

Katharine: I’m Katharine Wang and you’re listening Radio Fairfax in Fairfax, VA. This is Keys to Spiritual Growth. Today we’re going to answer listener questions live on the radio.

But first a reminder that you’re listening to Radio Fairfax, Fairfax, VA. Cablecast on Cox and Verizon FIOS Channel 37 and Comcast channel 27 in Reston, VA. Webcast worldwide on the internet at www.radiofairfax.org.Katharine Wang on the radio

We’re live once a month answering questions about God and the Bible. I like to think of it as the type of question you’d like to ask God if you could pull up and chair and maybe grab a cup of tea and ask him something. We take questions in advance and also live right now. The call in number is 703-560-TALK. That’s 703-560-8255. Or on Facebook at facebook.com/mbministries.

Katharine: I’m here with my friend Lorelei, who’s going to tell us what questions we’ve received from listeners this past month. Lorelei, you couldn’t be with us last month. It’s good to have you back.

Lorelei: It’s good to be back.

Katharine: Before you tell us the first question from listeners, did I tell you we have two special guests on the show?

Lorelei: You did. I’m excited about meeting them.

Katharine: Yes, Cheryl Krichbaum is here with Michele Bair. Cheryl is the founder of a new ministry called My body My worship, which I’m excited to hear about. Michele is going to be part of this ministry, too.

Lorelei: Welcome to Keys to Spiritual Growth with Katharine Wang. We’re excited to have you on the show today.

Cheryl: We’re excited to be here.

Katharine: So Cheryl, you grew up in Minnesota going to church with your family, but it was more of a tradition that you did and you didn’t really believe Christianity or have its power.

Cheryl: Yeah, I didn’t understand what Christ’s sacrifice was about. I knew all the Bible stories, but I didn’t understand what they meant for me. When life got difficult, I turned my back on church and on God then made some pretty big mistakes. I became even more bitter against God. But then I met a man who wasn’t scared away by my life. In retrospect, I can see that he was showing me what the love of Christ was like. To make a long story short, he prayed for me, I accepted Christ, and then we got married.

Katharine: Let’s fast forward. Tell us about your trip to Africa.

Cheryl: I was in Uganda just over a year ago on a short-term mission trip. I had taught your Bible studies to children and had met a 5-year-old boy with Down Syndrome. That night I was asking one of the pastors about special needs children in Uganda and Africa which led to a discussion about abortion. The pastor said that he preaches on how our words often send women to have abortions. And that’s when I knew I needed to change the conversation about abortion.

Cheryl Krichbaum on the radioKatharine: So you realized that the way the church talks about abortion can be damaging to women? How should the conversation change?

Cheryl: The pro-life movement usually talks about babies, trying to convince the abortion-minded that killing babies is wrong–and it is wrong. But the pro-choice movement is talking about women and women’s rights, not babies. Women choose abortion because they think it’s best for themselves. We are ego-centric people and Millenials even more so. We need to have conversations about women and the psychological damage that results from abortion. If they are Christians, then we also need to talk about the spiritual darkness they plunge themselves into when they have abortions. We need to have loving conversations that draw women into life–physically and spiritually.

Katharine: So women-centered, eternally-focused conversations about abortion. I like that. This topic has a personal interest to you, doesn’t it?

Cheryl: Yes, when life got difficult and I left the church and God, I went looking for love elsewhere. I spent more time with my boyfriend than in my parents’ home because life was difficult at home but pleasant with my boyfriend. Not surprisingly, I got pregnant. Because I didn’t want the shame of pregnancy in high school and because I wanted to stay on track with my education, I had an abortion. And then I made more bad choices, like living with my boyfriend, buying a house with him, and eventually marrying him even though I knew deep inside that I shouldn’t have. That marriage ended in divorce. And, by the way, I still had the shame of pregnancy in high school, and my education was not completed on schedule.

Katharine: What a powerful personal story. And now you’re founding a ministry called My Body My Worship. How is your work different from what other pro-life groups do?

Cheryl: We battle abortion in a way different than all other pro-life ministries–through true worship and teaching the nations all that Jesus commanded (Romans 12:1, Matthew 28:20). We do this through women’s conferences and social media posts.

Our mission is to inspire spiritual acts of worship by teaching biblically sound science of sexual integrity and psychological effects of abortion–based on Romans 12:1-2 and 1 Corinthians 6:12-20.

Katharine: Michele, that’s where you come in. You’ve been a worshipper and a worship leader at your church for more than 20 years.

Michele: Yes, one thing I’ve learned in over 20 years of leading worship is that our bodies, souls, and spirits are intertwined. When we worship, it washes out our spirits and souls. It’s like taking a spiritual shower. All the filth and grime of the day washes off, and we’re filled with God’s presence.

Katharine: And you’ve named the ministry My body my worship? Why?

Cheryl: The pro-choice movement says, “My body. My choice.” We say that it’s our choice to worship with our bodies. As Michele says, our worship and our bodies are intertwined. There are many ways to worship–with hymns, on our knees, with lifted hands, even dancing. But the New Testament believer should also worship with their whole bodies in a Levitical sense, meaning that they should be pure before the Lord.

We get this from Romans 12:1, which says: Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.

Michele: We are also using worship as King Jehoshaphat in the Bible did to defeat his enemies. In 2 Chronicles 20, we see that the kingdom of Judah was about to be attacked by many enemies. King Jehoshaphat immediately went to the Lord. He called the country to pray and fast. Then he sent out a worship team ahead of the army. And GOD defeated their enemies.

Cheryl: We too are at war–spiritual war. Women (and men, but most obviously women) are under attack–even from other women. Women are fooled into thinking that abortion is no big deal. We are fooled into believing that we can have safe sex outside of marriage. We abort in order to avoid the shame of being caught pregnant out of wedlock, and then we hide our abortions because we are ashamed.

Katharine: A lot of people think of abortion as a political issue. But you don’t. Explain.

Cheryl: We don’t think God sees abortion as a political issue. When you embrace Daniel chapter 4, you can’t help but realize that God is in control of who is in office. I do believe that God is unhappy with His Christian nation legalizing abortion, so yes, we need to de-fund Planned Parenthood and reverse Roe v Wade.

But God is unhappy with our hearts and is waiting for us, for Christians, to act like Christ. The real victory in this spiritual war is saving eternal lives of abortion-minded women and men here in the United States and around the world. The Church is bigger than our country and so is spiritual war.

So, we’re going to battle by worshipping through music, lifted hands, etc. and by teaching what both the Bible and science say about abortion and about sex.

Katharine: That’s intriguing. Both the Bible and science.

Cheryl: Yes, both the Bible and science because scientific research supports all the biblical laws about sex–Which is no surprise, right? since God created science.

Katharine: Can you tell me just one thing scientific research has found that supports what the Bible says about sex and abortion?

Cheryl: The hormones that are activated in us when we have sex bond us with our partner. So when people have heterosexual or homosexual sex, they feel bonded to that person. The Bible says, the two shall become one, which is reiterated in 1 Corinthians 6:12-20. When women break that bond, their emotions are affected and often they become depressed or develop anxiety. When men break that bond, they often become jealous ex-boyfriends.

Katharine: Wow. So our bodies were physically designed to operate best when we make a marriage connection to just one person. Alright, shifting gears a little, I’d love to hear what you would say to a woman who has an unplanned pregnancy right now who is thinking about an abortion?

Cheryl: When I had my abortion, I plunged myself into darkness. Even before there was a TV show called “The Walking Dead,” I described myself as the walking dead. I looked alive. I acted happy. But I wasn’t. I was dead inside. When you choose death for what is growing inside of you, you also choose death for yourself and Satan wins. God loves you so much that He doesn’t want the pain of abortion for you.

Katharine: What would you say to a young woman thinking about having sex before getting married?

Michele: As young women, we were told it’s OK to have sex as long as you use birth control. Today they called it “safer” sex. But the Bible doesn’t say that it’s okay to have sex if we use birth control. God says the only way to fully experience the beauty that He made sex to be is to have it with just the one person of the opposite sex to whom you are married. In fact, sex outside marriage is so dangerous–both physically and spiritually–it can scar our bodies, emotions, and spirits forever. Until we ask Jesus to heal those wounds.

Cheryl: The biggest advantage of sexual purity, of course, is obeying God–this is your spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1) and your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19). When our spirits are pure, we can hear more clearly from the Lord and become like spiritual superheroes. Nothing is impossible for us spiritually. When we live with sin, it’s like Superman meets kryptonite. Sin drains our spiritual power. Sex outside of marriage makes us weaklings spiritually. We can’t hear God, and we can be easily defeated. Sexual purity gives us spiritual super-strength. It keeps our emotions free of deep wounds.

But it also keeps our physical bodies free of so many diseases. For example, HPV is so prevalent now that we have a vaccine for it. Women are biologically more susceptible to HPV than men and get it even if the condom works perfectly.

We need to change the conversation about abortion. We need to talk about abortion and sex more in church than in politics. We need to teach our generation and the generations after us. This is not a young person’s issue. This is a heart issue of all the generations. All the generations need healing. And in a 2 Chronicles 7:14 way, all generations need to repent and seek God’s face if we want revival–and we believe our conferences will spark revival.

Katharine: What about a woman who has already had an abortion, like yourself, Cheryl? What would you say to someone like you?

Cheryl: Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6). If we want life, if we want to stop being the walking dead, then we have to accept Jesus’ love for us. I chose Christ and then later admitted to Him that I was wrong to have an abortion. And He immediately washed away my sins, and I felt clean and alive. You can have that freedom, too. Start with Psalm 51 and then contact your local pregnancy center for a post-abortion healing class. You can also seek a healing ministry or attend one of our conferences.

Katharine: I’ve never had an abortion, but I lost two children in utero, so I understand the guilt and feelings of loss that we feel anytime we lose a pregnancy. And I can also tell you that our children are with God. I believe I will spend eternity with them. And they always have a place in our hearts. Their short lives served a purpose here even if they were never born.

Cheryl: Yes. And our babies love us and forgive us. They are in heaven waiting for their moms. And those babies whose moms do not know Christ are crying. We Christians have got to share the Gospel with post-abortive women so that those babies are consoled and reconciled some day with their mothers in heaven.

Katharine: Amazing work you’re both doing Cheryl and Michele. If someone wanted to find out more about your work, how could they do it?

Cheryl: Our website is MybodyMyworship.org. We’re also on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. We also do MybodyMyworship conferences at churches. You can find out information about how to get involved or how to bring a conference to your church on our website. We honestly believe that worshipping the Lord in this way will spark revival.

Katharine: It’s been a delight to have you on our show today.

Cheryl: Thank you for having us!

In Christ,

Cheryl

Sex Does Not Equal Love

Dear Christian Sisters,

If we want to end abortion, then we need to end sexual immorality. Share posts from @MybodyMyworship today!

If we want revival, then we need to worship God with our whole bodies (Romans 1:1, 1 Corinthians 6:19).

Today, Valentine’s Day, is a great day to dispel the lies about sex. Sex does not equal love.

Follow @MybodyMyworship on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, then like and share the posts to reach the generations with the truth about the consequences of pre-marital sex.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Legalized Abortion & the Anniversary of Roe v Wade

Dear Christian Sisters,

Today, January 22nd, is the 45th anniversary of Roe v Wade.

Although I am heartbroken that our country has given in to satan’s* lies, let us not be deceived into thinking that reversing Roe v Wade will end abortion. It won’t.

Abortion is illegal in countries all over the world, yet the abortion rate is still high in those countries.

Uganda’s Abortion Rate

In Uganda, where abortion is illegal, the abortion rate is thought to be as high as 70%. What will change that?

Changing the abortion rate requires a societal change away from pre-marital sex, adultery, and tribal traditions of having multiple wives to following what the Bible says about sex—that is, only having sex with the one person whom you marry.

Cheryl preaching sexual integrity in Kigumba, Uganda
Crazy Hair Krichbaum, or as my mission-trip teammates called me, Chastity Krichbaum. Pic taken in Kigumba, Uganda January 3, 2018

The whole society has to change, and that change needs to begin within the church. For that very reason, I have been preaching sexual integrity in Uganda.

Now to do the same here in the United States. (New ministry beginning this year: MybodyMyworship, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.)

The Effects of Reversing Roe v Wade

More Needs in the United States

When (not if) we reverse Roe v Wade, the need to care for women will rise.

We will have more women in crisis pregnancy centers.

We will have more women in emergency rooms because women will go to unsafe doctors or take homemade concoctions that not only kill the babies but hurt themselves.

We will have more children in the foster care system.

We will also have more children born with disabilities.

Are you ready for that reality?

What are you doing through your church to get ready?

Further, you will have even more women angry at Christians because, from their perspective, we are putting them into bondage.

We need to stand firm. We need to convince them that we are protecting them from satan’s* bondage of lies and darkness.

Influencing the Abortion Rate Worldwide

Reversing Roe v Wade will also reduce the abortion rate worldwide.

Why? Because with legalized abortion, we are telling the rest of the world that abortion is okay. Despite their own laws, they are following our example.

Whether we like it or not, we are watched by the world. Whether we agree or not, we are perceived to be a Christian country.

Because we are perceived to be a Christian country, we are telling the rest of the world that Christ approves of abortion at any point in the pregnancy.

By restricting pro-abortion laws and eventually reversing Roe v Wade, we are telling the world that Christ is against abortion.

Simultaneously Pro-Active in Politics and Pro-Active in Our Communities

So let’s get ready. In politics:

Through your church:

The abortion rate is not going to change with us sitting here idly reading blog posts. Let’s get to work.

In Christ,

Cheryl

* I refuse to capitalize “satan.” He does not deserve the respect of a capitalized name.

Abortion: Changing the Conversation

Dear Christian Sisters,

I am Cheryl Krichbaum, a wife, a mom, a former web-based training project manager, a prayer warrior, and the founder of MyBodyMyWorship, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

I am an outspoken Christian, just telling it like it is. And I have a mission.

Cheryl Krichbaum

My mission is to change the conversation about abortion. Perhaps as a result, Christians will think and talk differently about abortion and then accomplish the Great Commission one hurting woman—and man—at a time.

I firmly believe that the pro-life movement is a Great Commission opportunity:

Rather than just pro-life, let’s be pro-eternal-life.

Why CherylKrichbaum.com?

Naming my website with my name rather than a created name for my ministry provides me the opportunity to write about whatever the Lord places on my heart, even if that’s something other than abortion and purity. For the foreseeable future, though, my posts will address those issues.

Naming my website CherylKrichbaum.com may seem arrogant to you, but for me it’s recognition that “Cheryl Krichbaum” is my Christian name, a name taken in humbleness and gratitude to my Father above.

Cheryl Krichbaum is my married name, the name I took when I married Russ. Just five months before we got married, I chose to have a personal relationship with Christ. That is, I changed from being a Christian by birth to a Christian by choice. I changed from being a hearer of The Word to a doer of The Word. I changed from being a Christian by title to a disciple of Christ.

Russ is my second husband. When I was married the first time (before I became a Christian), I did not change my name. So, until I married Russ (after I became a Christian), I had always had my birth name.

When Russ and I got engaged, I did not want to change my name. I remember that we argued about it. Russ felt emasculated, but I was offended, too. For me, it wasn’t about Russ. It was about wanting to feel valued for me.

Somewhere in those four months that we were engaged, the Lord softened my heart and made me realize that Hewas giving me a new name. So Cheryl Krichbaum not only is my married name, not only the name that I chose, but the name that reflects both Russ’ love for me and God’s love for me.

My Story Exchanged for His Story

You can read my story in the following blog posts: Faces of Abortion and Forgiveness and Peace that Passes All Understanding or watch my testimony on Facebook.

Someday you’ll be able to read many more details in my memoir, which I am editing and preparing for publication right now.

I Believe

I believe that we need to change the focus from babies who have no voice to women who are in charge of their own bodies. The pro-choice movement is all about the women, so we need to address their issues head on (know thy audience!). That’s what a true Aristotelian rhetorician would do. That’s what the Apostle Paul, a classical rhetorician, would do. That’s what we need to do, too.

We need to:

  • focus on saving eternal lives, not just mortal lives.
  • talk about abortion and sexual integrity more in church than in politics. Why? Because abortion is illegal in most countries throughout the world, yet the abortion rate in those countries is still very high. Yes, we need to de-fund Planned Parenthood. Yes, we need to reverse Roe v Wade. But we also need to understand that the law won’t change hearts. Only Christ can do that.
  • teach men, women, and children to be obedient to God’s rules about sex. Just think about how many fewer abortions would be “needed” if there were fewer crisis pregnancies.
  • repent over our own sexual sins and our own silence about abortion and sexual immorality.
  • help men and women heal from abortion so that they do not abort again and heal from sexual immorality so that they have sex only within marriage.

In Christ,

Cheryl

MyBodyMyWorship—God’s Counter to “My body. My choice.”

Dear Christian Sisters,

It all came together in Uganda.

A year ago, I came home from Uganda, the Pearl of Africa, where I had been on my first short-term mission trip. While teaching the Bible to children, I met a 5-year-old boy with Down Syndrome. His left eye was closed, just his left eye.Ugandan boy with Down Syndrome

I was born with my left eye closed, too. But, even though my family had little money, we did have insurance, so I have had 4 surgeries to open the lid. (As a result, the lid doesn’t like to close any more, and I wink at everyone!)

I have boys with mild special needs, and I am in a small group of moms of special needs children.

Raising children isn’t easy. Raising a child with special needs is outright challenging.

I can’t imagine how challenging it is for that mother to raise a boy with Down Syndrome in a developing country where her son not only will never go to school but is thought to be a curse or demon possessed.

As I asked our pastors what happens to children with special needs, I was confronted by the horror of murder.

Often, African women who have children with obvious physical deformities will drop their children into a pit. And by pit, I mean an outhouse with no seat. A toilet. An African squatty potty.

In the U.S., we don’t wait until the child is born. If the results of the amniocentesis indicate Down Syndrome, we abort.

What’s the difference?
Size—The baby may be smaller.
Location—The baby is inside a womb instead of outside.

It’s still murder.

I asked whether abortion was legal in Uganda. No, it’s not legal. But women still abort.

Keep that in mind when you think about abortion as a political issue. Yes, we need to change the law. But the law doesn’t change hearts. Only Christ can do that.

One of the pastors on the mission trip went on to talk about one of his pet peeves—how we talk to our daughters sends them to abort. He preached there in Uganda against telling our daughters not to come home pregnant because when we say that, our daughters abort rather than shaming their families.

Is it really any different in the U.S.?

With that, I knew what the Lord was calling me to do. He was calling me to change the conversation about abortion.

Abortion: Changing the ConversationAs I’ve been speaking and blogging over the last year, the Lord gave me His vision for a new ministry. My friend and I have named it MyBodyMyWorship—all together because they are intertwined.MyBodyMyWorship

You may have seen the pro-choice movement called “My body. My choice.” MyBodyMyWorship is God’s counter-movement.

While again in Uganda over New Year’s, it all came together. I understood what the Lord wants MyBodyMyWorship to do—teach Christians what it means to worship Him in all ways:

  • Song
  • Lifting hands
  • Dance
  • Kneeling in reverence
  • Serving others

—just to name a few. But also to worship Him with our bodies:

Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.
Romans‬ ‭12:1‬ ‭NASB‬‬

Why Christians?

  • Because Christians need to get out of abortion clinics.
  • Because Christians need to obey Christ’s commands about sex.
  • Because people who say they are Christians need to become Christ followers.

So MyBodyMyWorship will teach:

  • What it means to worship God
  • The psychological effects of abortion
  • The biblical reasons to not abort
  • What science says about how we bond to our sex partners—all of them
  • The biblical reasons to have sex with only your spouse
  • How to heal from abortion and from sexual immorality

And will include:

  • Worship music
  • Testimonies
  • Prayer

based on Romans 12:1-2 and 1 Corinthians 6:12-20.

I had the opportunity to teach a shortened version while in Uganda, and it was well received. People are hungry for the truth.

Stay tuned for MyBodyMyWorship events.

Ask us to schedule an event at your church.

Follow @MyBodyMyWorship on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Brave Like Joseph (#BraveLikeMary Series)

Dear Christian Sisters,

In my post, What about Mary’s Parents, we considered how Mary’s parents might have reacted to her news. Today, let’s talk about Joseph.

Mary was looked upon with favor by the Lord and considered herself a bondslave of God. I would expect someone with that much integrity would tell her fiancé her news before traveling a long distance to visit Elizabeth.

Joseph must have been upset both at her news and that she left town before their wedding. We know that Mary told Joseph that she was carrying the Messiah, for Matthew says:

Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: when His mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child by the Holy Spirit. And Joseph her husband, being a righteous man and not wanting to disgrace her, planned to send her away secretly. But when he had considered this, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream.
Matthew 1:18-20a

How much of these three verses happened before Mary left for Judah?

  • Perhaps Mary told Joseph just as she was leaving.
  • Perhaps Joseph took the whole 3 months Mary was gone to consider this.
  • Perhaps, while Mary was gone, Joseph met with his rabbi to discuss what to do.
  • Perhaps Joseph thought it was best for Mary to stay in Judah so that she would be safe, protected from stoning.
  • Perhaps the angel visited Joseph while Mary was in Judah.
  • Perhaps Mary returned to Nazareth shortly after Joseph had the dream.

But when he had considered this, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife; for the Child who has been conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. She will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins.”

Now all this took place to fulfill what was spoken by the Lord through the prophet:

“Behold, the virgin shall be with child and shall bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,” which translated means, “God with us.”

And Joseph awoke from his sleep…
Matthew 1:20-24a

Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Mary, you’re back! You wouldn’t believe the dream I just had. Well, maybe you would! I believe that you are carrying the Messiah! I will marry you. We will raise the Messiah together.”

And Joseph awoke from his sleep and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him, and took Mary as his wife, but kept her a virgin until she gave birth to a Son; and he called His name Jesus.
Matthew 1:24b-25

Then shortly after,

In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered. This was the first registration when Quirinius was governor of Syria. And all went to be registered, each to his own town. And Joseph also went up from Galilee, from the town of Nazareth, to Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David, to be registered with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child.
Luke 2:1-5

And they looked at each other in shared understanding. Scripture said that the Messiah would be born in Bethlehem (Micah 5:2). They knew that the decree was part of God’s plan, and they went.

Lord, may our Christian men be as brave as Joseph, saying “yes” to Jesus by loving Christian women and raising our children with us for God’s glory. Amen!

In Christ,

Cheryl