Pro-Life, Not Pro-Political Party

When we rally behind a political party rather than LOVE, we anger everyone in the other party and rally our own, resulting in preaching to the choir. The choir doesn’t need convincing.

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

Let’s choose pro-life posts to share on social media, not pro-political party posts.

When we attack a political party, we put people on the defense and they are less open to our points.

We also make abortion an issue only of the USA when it’s actually a worldwide issue.

Reversing Roe v Wade is an interim step, not the final goal. The goal is to make abortion unthinkable worldwide.

Instead, let’s talk about becoming more Christ-like. If people are more like Christ, then God can lead them to vote in the way that meets His purposes…

Which may not be YOUR purposes.

And, let’s get realistic: The Democrats for Life are likely the ones who will turn the political tide in our country.

When we rally behind a political party rather than LOVE, we anger everyone in the other party and rally our own, resulting in preaching to the choir. The choir doesn’t need convincing.

That’s helpful if we’re running for office, but most of us are not.

We’re running the race for Christ.

In Christ,

  • Cheryl

Listen to Alyssa Milano

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

On Sunday, Alyssa Milano told her abortion story on her podcast. Some news outlets reported on it, including the LA Times, Us Weekly, and FOX.

Rather than getting mad at her for justifying what she did (for I, too, had an abortion), let’s read what Alyssa actually said (which I transcribed from her podcost):

I was on the pill, taking birth control, because I knew that I was not ready to be a parent… Also, at that time, I was taking a drug called Accutane. Accutane is an acne medicine that is so likely to cause birth defects if taken by a pregnant woman that the FDA now requires doctors, pharmacists, and women to sign up to a registry before dispensing it. So using contraception was doubly important to me.

And I still got pregnant.

It was devastating. I was raised Catholic and was suddenly put in conflict with my faith, faith I was coming to realize empowered only men to make every single decision about what was allowed and what was not allowed…

I chose to have an abortion I chose. It was my choice. And it was absolutely the right choice for me. It was not an easy choice. It was not something I wanted, but it was something that I needed, like most health care is.

I refuse to let anyone else’s bullshit morality force me into a life of premarital celibacy. I refuse to live in the narrative that sexual pleasure is for men and that women exist to deliver that pleasure. My body gives me pleasure. Sexually connecting with my partner gave me pleasure. No one would say that he was at fault for enjoying sex with me, but you can be damn sure that the men enacting these laws think less of me for deriving the same pleasure from him…

They tell you that the pill is 99% effective at preventing pregnancies and yet [here, she let’s out a big sigh] a few months later, I found out that I was pregnant again. So, I had done what I knew to do to prevent pregnancy and was still pregnant. So once again, I made the right decision to end that pregnancy…

The assault against women’s bodies has forced me to reflect on what I would’ve lost if I never had my abortions. I would not have my children… I would not have my career… I would never have met my amazing husband David… I would never have been free to be myself… That’s what this freedom is about: freedom. Freedom from oppression. Freedom for women to have the audacity to be equally sexual beings as men. freedom for women to live the life they were meant to have not just the life that is thrust upon them by a pregnancy that cannot exist in their life.

Listening to Alyssa tell her story is heartbreaking for me because…

  • I hear the pain in her voice.
  • I hear her regret for being pregnant and her regret of being faced with a choice.
  • I hear her anger toward patriarchy and inequality and hypocrisy.
  • I hear her heartbreak that she was twice in the 1% of birth control failure when she expected to be in the 99%.
  • I hear the anger for Christianity, which she sees as favoring men.

It’s heartbreaking to hear because I once thought like she does.

Regret about Pregnancy

I remember that I was more upset about being pregnant and having to choose than I was about the abortion itself. I blamed everyone else for my pregnancy rather than taking responsibility for choosing to have sex, which exists for procreation (whether you believe in creationism or evolution).

So, I was mad that sex did what it was supposed to do—make babies.

Do you hear that from Alyssa, too? What does that tell you about our sex education programs?

Inequality & Hypocrisy

When I hear Alyssa’s anger at inequality and hypocrisy, I want to cheer her on! Why? Because men are historically seen as studs when they get women pregnant, but women pregnant out-of-wedlock have been seen as whores. That hypocrisy makes me mad.

The reality is that men can have sex with multiple women with little consequence compared to the consequences for women. Women are at much higher risk for STIs/STDs because they are on the receiving end.

Women are the ones who get pregnant while men can walk away—and many men do, and many men have. Then the woman has to find him and fight for financial support.

If he’s not a nice guy, then she has to hide to protect herself and her child.

If she’s not interested in him any more, then she doesn’t want a child to keep her forever connected to him.

For the pro-choice movement, abortion is an equality issue. Alyssa says it in her podcast. The guests she quoted in her podcast say it. Can you see why?

Men have hurt women. Men have a reputation for hurting women, not protecting them.

So, when Alyssa and others in the pro-choice movement see male legislators writing anti-abortion laws, she does not see them as protecting her but as hurting her in yet another way.

What’s the answer?

One answer is for men to improve their reputation.

Oh, how I would like to hear a male, pro-life politician apologize for all the men who have not stood up to their responsibilities and to call for men to do better.

Men who are good men need to be mentoring other men—of every age. They need to be good dads to their sons and daughters. They need to teach their sons and especially their daughters what to look for in a spouse and what to watch out for when dating.

Women who are married to good men need to be heralding their husbands to their children and their friends publicly so that society hears that there are good men out there.

I’ll start! Russ is an awesome provider who would never run away from his children. Actually, Russ would have chosen to stop after our first was born because he felt too old to have our second one, but he never considered aborting. Today, our second boy is a chip off the old block. They truly enjoy their relationship.

(Follow Love Harder Marriage Coaching for more positive stories about husbands and fathers.)

Equality or Bondage?

The irony is that Alyssa and my former self see premarital sex and abortion as an equality issue, but I now see premarital sex and abortion as a bondage issue.

Roe v Wade was decided by men. What does legalized abortion allow? It allows men to have more extra-marital sex without consequences of providing for their children.

  • The baby daddy is the number one influence on a woman’s choice to abort.
  • Fathers, even Christian fathers, bring their daughters to abortion clinics.
  • Abusers bring women to abortion clinics.
  • Men bring their underage girlfriends to abortion clinics.
  • Sex traffickers bring women to abortion clinics.

That’s not equity. That’s bondage.

If we want abortion to be unthinkable, then we need to be talking to men, influencing men, to do better. I’m a mother of two boys. I’m starting at home.

Hollywood

Here’s another irony in what Alyssa has to say. At the time of her abortions, Alyssa was on the “women-empowering” show Charmed. She was one of three female stars of the TV series, which was created by a woman.

If Hollywood executives had written her out of the series for being pregnant, wouldn’t we have screamed women’s oppression? and inequality in the workplace?

Alyssa’s boyfriend/fiance—whom she did not call out, but I will: Scott Wolf—certainly had the money to support their child. She had enough money to raise their child or to put their baby up for adoption. So what was the concern?

The concern is that Alyssa’s career would’ve been ruined.

Don’t be surprised by this. Hollywood was paying for / providing abortions to actresses long before Roe v Wade.

Further, Lisa Whelchel, a Christian, who was on the TV show “The Facts of Life” (1979-88) talked about how she was given a scale and expected to weigh in every day. Skinniness is not just expected but demanded in Hollywood. Pregnancy messes that up.

In contrast, Gal Gadot, who played “Wonder Woman” in the recent DC Extended Universe movie, filmed several scenes while pregnant. Note that she had a female director.

But I wonder if Alyssa has ever talked to Taraji P Henson, who didn’t let her toddler or her status as a single mother stop her from becoming a multiple award winning actress.

“What if I believed those people who told me when I became pregnant in college that I wouldn’t finish? I walked across that stage with my son on my hip.” ~Taraji P. Henson, “Empire” and “Hidden Figures”

1% not 99%

I hear Alyssa upset that both of her unwanted pregnancies were from the 1% ineffectiveness of the pill.

This makes me wonder if Alyssa ever took math. I wonder if so many people in the pro-choice movement took math. I wonder how I was so blind when I was pro-choice.

The thinking is that we did everything to prevent pregnancy, so why are we pregnant? But we didn’t do everything to prevent pregnancy because if we had, we wouldn’t be pregnant. What? What’s that? It’s called abstinence.

Women and men, don’t be surprised if you’re having sex and get pregnant. It’s called biology.

Patriarchy & the Church

Did you notice that Alyssa looks at the Catholic church, and therefore the Pope, as male oppression? The same could be said of Protestant churches that do not allow female pastors. This is certainly how I felt.

Again, I find this ironic, because if Christians were actually not having sex outside of marriage, then Alyssa wouldn’t think that what Pope Paul VI said in Humanae Vitae (1968) or what Pope John Paul II said in Theology of the Body (1979-1984) favored men rather than women.

And no, I’m not Catholic.

When the Holy Spirit first tapped on my shoulder (on my first Uganda mission trip) about speaking boldly about abortion, I had just said to two male pastors, “Women don’t want to hear this message from men. You don’t understand. There’s no way you can understand. Women need to hear from women.”

So, we women need to speak up. And when we do, we need to be clear that we have not been convinced by “male oppressors” but instead by scientific research.

And men, you need to talk to men because their influence is much larger than the pro-choice movement is willing to admit. Teach men to be men, to step up, to provide, to be responsible, to father well.

Sex is the responsibility of both men and women.

  • Both have a choice.
  • Both are smart enough to realize that even 1% ineffectiveness can result in pregnancy.
  • Both have a responsibility to provide for the child they helped to create.

Me Too, Alyssa. Sorry, Not Sorry.

Alyssa ended her podcast saying, “I, for one, will never stop using my voice. Sorry, not sorry.”

Yeah, me too, Alyssa—not that I have your pretty face, your slim figure, or your Hollywood credentials, for I am just a woman who listens to both sides, discusses rather than rants, reasons with others out of love rather than self-justification, and who votes her values.

I vote for abundant life not just for babies, but for women.

My body. My choice. It’s my body, and with it I will worship the Lord.

MybodyMyworshipBROWN

In Christ,

Cheryl

P.S. The video at the top of the FOX news article is from May 2019 and is demeaning—please don’t applaud FOX or Tucker Carlson for that awful interview with Mark Steyn. We don’t win this battle by belittling but through love.

Abortion Hurts Women Spiritually

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

This headline makes me so angry! No wonder so many women in The Church abort—they are not hearing the truth!

36% of women who abort go to church at least once per month (Care-Net 2016).

Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of Christ. (Romans 10:17 NASB)

So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32 ESV)

As a post-abortive woman myself, let me explain what abortion does to women spiritually.

I have yet to hear the following message in any Sanctity of Life sermon, but every woman and man needs to hear it.

God is Holy, and He Hates Sin

God has set standards for how we are to live, not because He wants to control us or take away our fun but because He loves us as a perfect Father does.

Now, we do not have perfect fathers here on earth, and many of you have broken relationships with your imperfect fathers. I realize that our broken view of fatherhood makes it difficult to see God as a loving Father, but perhaps you can imagine with me.

Anyone remember the TV show Leave It to Beaver? Remember how the father worked hard, provided for his family, and loved his wife and his boys?

How about the father in the Brady Bunch?

My Three Sons?

How about Liam Neeson’s character in the “Taken” series of movies? Clearly he’s imperfect but fiercely protective of his virgin daughter.

God, as Our Father, Creates Standards for Us Because He Loves Us

God is love. (1 John 4:8)

From the Old Testament to the New, God removed the food standards (all the standards for eating kosher foods), but He did not remove the moral standards. We can read these moral standards in the 10 Commandments and other places.

Jesus reiterated the 10 Commandments by telling His Jewish audience to love God and love people.

When our parents create boundaries for us—or standards—we know that if we do not follow their rules, we will experience consequences, such as a time-out when we’re little or losing privileges when we’re teenagers.

God, our loving Father, taught parents to create standards because that’s what He does. We are to reflect His fatherhood. We are imperfect people and therefore imperfect parents (just ask my boys), so we do not reflect God perfectly, but we are called to try.

God’s standards include keeping sex within marriage and not murdering. (Before you get mad at me, remember that I have not kept either of these standards.)

If you need a reminder of the Bible verses that show these standards, see the links below to my other websites:

Best Pro-Life Bible Verses

Bible Verses on Sexual Immorality

So, what happens when we break God’s standards? I think the best example is to look at King David’s life.

David and Bathsheba

David’s whole story shows us a man of great faith (God calls Him a man after His own heart [Acts 13:22]) but also a man of a great imperfections.

Let’s look at what happens to David when he does not keep sex within marriage and then murders to cover his sin.

You are probably familiar with David and Bathsheba’s story, but let me give you a quick reminder. The short version is that David used his kingly power to have sex with another man’s wife and then killed the man to cover up his sin (see 2 Samuel 11).

Today in the United States, you might expect a rich man to offer his mistress money for an abortion or even pressure her into having an abortion. But that’s not what David does.

Why not? Because the Hebrews valued babies.

Until Nathan confronts David, the king thinks he has gotten away with his sin of extra-marital sex and of murder.

After Nathan explains things, David immediately takes responsibility and confesses his sin (see 2 Samuel 12).

The Spiritual Consequences of Murder and Adultery

David then goes into the Tent of Meeting and sings his confession, as recorded in Psalm 51. He also sings Psalm 32. From these two Psalms, we learn what happens when we murder and commit adultery:

  • When we keep silent about our sin, our bodies waste away. (Ps 32:3)
  • The Lord’s hand is heavy upon us. (Ps 32:4)
  • Our vitality is drained away. (Ps 32:4)
  • We yearn to hear joy and gladness again. (Ps 51:8)
  • We can’t wait for our broken bones to rejoice. (Ps 51:8)
  • We want to feel the Holy Spirit within us. (Ps 51:11)
  • We want to be renewed with a steadfast spirit. (Ps 51:10)
  • We want to be restored with the joy of salvation. (Ps 51:12)

Why do we desire the Holy Spirit? Because when we have more of the Holy Spirit, we have more fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Gal 5:22-23).

In my memoir, ReTested, I explain my 14 or so years between my abortion and my confession as walking through life dead inside. I called myself “the walking dead” before there was a TV show by that name!

Pastoral Leadership

So, Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, Presbyterian, and United Church of Christ pastors in Tennessee, when you tell women that it’s okay to abort, you are telling them that it’s okay to live separated from God, that God doesn’t mind that they murdered, that it’s okay to walk around like zombies.

The truth is that Jesus came to set us free (Galatians 5:1) and so that we can have abundant life (John 10:10). Abortion does not result in abundant life. It results in drained vitality (Psalm 32:4; John 10:10).

Your letter to Tennessee Gov. Bill Lee is not the kind of leadership we women deserve. We deserve to be:

  • taught the truth (John 8:31-32; Acts 17:10-11).
  • gently rebuked like Nathan gently rebuked David (2 Samuel 12) and Jesus gently rebuked the woman at the well (John 4:4-42) and the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11).
  • taught the path to renewed vitality (Matthew 6:12-15) so that we can live abundantly (John 10:10).

Further, for those women who do not believe that Jesus is the Christ who died for our sins (Romans 5:8), was raised from the dead (Romans 10:9-10), and today sits at the right hand of God, you are telling them that it’s okay to be forever separated from their babies and spend eternity separated from God.

And just to appeal to the practical nature of running your local church, if you want women to serve in the church, get them freed from their sins.

Freedom Is Available, and It’s Awesome!

If you have been involved in an abortion—whether you had one yourself or “supported” a woman through one—you can have your vitality renewed, like I did.

The path to renewed vitality is confession (Matthew 6:12, 14-15) and returning to God (John 8:11).

We protestants do not spend enough time talking about the benefits of confession. Let me just tell you from my own experience that confession and forgiveness results in freedom and abundant life!

And freedom is awesome!

Post-Abortion Healing Is Available!

Post-abortion healing classes are offered through pregnancy centers and some churches using curricula like Surrendering the Secret and Forgiven and Set Free. The Catholic Church offers Project Rachel.

Men who have pressured a woman, drove her to the clinic, or paid for the abortion need healing, too. Some pregnancy centers offer classes for them as well. A common curriculum is Healing a Father’s Heart.

The links to books above are affiliate links. Any remuneration that I receive from affiliate links are used to pay for my three websites: CherylKrichbaum.blog, MybodyMyworship.org, and FacesofAbortion.com. Please contact me if you have any questions.

In Christ,

Cheryl

A Different Kind of #ShoutYourAbortion Movement

#Shoutyourabortion claims that abortion is no big deal because everyone does it. The truth is that 92% of post-abortive women experience emotional deadening.

Dear Christian Sisters,

Let me start by apologizing for not writing to you for so many months. I have been absent from my blog because I’ve been walking through more life tests. Although the Lord has been faithful to lead me through these tests, my ability to hear His will for this blog has been muffled.

Until this morning.

Early Morning Quiet Time with God

Until today, I have been sleeping in over the summer, having my quiet time with the Lord after breakfast. Lately, I’ve been struggling to get back on my early morning schedule because I am a night person. However, I know that my early morning prayer time makes the school year go so much more smoothly, so I need to get back on track.

This morning, though, I had no problem waking up. No coffee needed! The Lord woke me up at 5:30 am with very clear messages for this blog, so I am writing to you to tell you all that He impressed on my heart.

Writing about Abortion from the Woman’s Perspective

One of the things that I’ve been doing amidst the hardest test of late (which I will tell you about in another post) is writing my memoir. I am editing it now and plan to publish this fall.

Three Books In Process

The first of three books, my memoir is currently titled One Face of Abortion. Books two and three will be Faces of Abortion, Book One and Faces of Abortion, Book Two (with an awesome subtitle that I am not yet revealing).Future books by Cheryl Krichbaum

Whereas the first book is my abortion story (well, really it’s my full testimony), books two and three will contain many abortion stories from repentant Christian women. Why? Because you need to hear the devastating effects of abortion on women and the lies and life circumstances that led them to abort. To be effective in how we minister to abortion-minded women, we need to better understand them.

(Would you be willing to let me tell your story in one of my books? You may be anonymous, if you’d like. If you’ll allow me to interview you, please contact me through MybodyMyworship!)

The intent is not to celebrate our abortions—far from it! The intent is to tell the truth about the devastating effects of abortions on our lives.

The #ShoutYourAbortion Movement Is a Lie

The #shoutyourabortion movement is about removing the stigma of abortion for women who are still trying to justify their “choice.”

The lie of the #shoutyourabortion movement is that abortion is a good thing or at least that it’s no big deal.#ShoutYourAbortion is a lie

The truth is that abortion has devastating effects on women’s psyches and our spiritual lives.

Spiritual lives? But pro-choice women aren’t Christians, you say–Not all true!

  • 35% of women were attending a Christian church once a month or more at the time of their first abortion.
  • 27% of post-abortive women identify as Catholic.
  • 26% of post-abortive women identify as Protestant.
  • 15% of post-abortive women identify as nondenominational. (Care Net 2016)

Further, many post-abortive women, whether they identify as Christian or not, don’t think that they can set foot in a church. I don’t have statistics, but I keep hearing it:

“God won’t forgive me.”
“I’m not worthy of God’s love.”
“I’m not good enough for church.”

With the pro-life focus on dead babies, we don’t often hear about the psychological effects of abortion on women—the very ones who are making most of the decisions to abort.

It’s time to change that. That’s why I title my blog “Changing the Conversation.” Here are some statistics on the effects of abortion on women:

  • 92% of post-abortive women experience emotional deadening.
  • 86% of post-abortive women experience anger or rage. (Although not in the study, I would add bitterness based on my own experience.)
  • 86% of post-abortive women fear others finding out.
  • 82% of post-abortive women experience intense feelings of loneliness or isolation.
  • 63% of post-abortive women experience denial.
  • 58% of post-abortive women battle nightmares.
  • 56% of post-abortive women develop suicidal feelings.
  • 53% of post-abortive women engage in drug abuse.
  • 39% of post-abortive women have eating disorders.
  • (See “Medical Reports” in Citations.)

I experienced emotional deadening. I called myself the walking dead long before the TV show aired. I was bitter. I feared others finding out. I lost my joy.

Post-Abortive Men Feel It, Too

Further, we are on the tip of the iceberg, so to speak, on the devastating effects of abortion on post-abortive men—the very ones who supported or even pressured women to abort. A woman’s sex partner is the number one influencer on her decision (see the Care Net study). That was true for me, too.

I look forward to hearing from post-abortive, repentant Christian men.

Need a New Hashtag

It’s time for us to speak up! Perhaps we need a new hashtag! Is #speakuppostabortiveChristians too long?

In Christ,

Cheryl

PS. If you or someone you know has had an abortion and is hiding in shame, find a Christian pregnancy center or church near you that offers an abortion healing class. Search Care Net for a pregnancy center. Two abortion healing curricula are Surrendering the Secret (this is the one that I did) and Forgiven and Set Free (which my friend did).

Citations:

Care Net. “Study of Women Who Have Had an Abortion & Their Views on Church.” 2016.

“Medical Reports/Women’s Health/Abortion…Is There a Connection?” from noelforlife.org

Announcing MybodyMyworship!

Dear Christian Sisters,

I had the privilege of being interviewed on the radio about my new ministry, MybodyMyworship. When the audio recording becomes available, I’ll share it with you, but in the meantime, here is the transcript.

Katharine: I’m Katharine Wang and you’re listening Radio Fairfax in Fairfax, VA. This is Keys to Spiritual Growth. Today we’re going to answer listener questions live on the radio.

But first a reminder that you’re listening to Radio Fairfax, Fairfax, VA. Cablecast on Cox and Verizon FIOS Channel 37 and Comcast channel 27 in Reston, VA. Webcast worldwide on the internet at www.radiofairfax.org.Katharine Wang on the radio

We’re live once a month answering questions about God and the Bible. I like to think of it as the type of question you’d like to ask God if you could pull up and chair and maybe grab a cup of tea and ask him something. We take questions in advance and also live right now. The call in number is 703-560-TALK. That’s 703-560-8255. Or on Facebook at facebook.com/mbministries.

Katharine: I’m here with my friend Lorelei, who’s going to tell us what questions we’ve received from listeners this past month. Lorelei, you couldn’t be with us last month. It’s good to have you back.

Lorelei: It’s good to be back.

Katharine: Before you tell us the first question from listeners, did I tell you we have two special guests on the show?

Lorelei: You did. I’m excited about meeting them.

Katharine: Yes, Cheryl Krichbaum is here with Michele Bair. Cheryl is the founder of a new ministry called My body My worship, which I’m excited to hear about. Michele is going to be part of this ministry, too.

Lorelei: Welcome to Keys to Spiritual Growth with Katharine Wang. We’re excited to have you on the show today.

Cheryl: We’re excited to be here.

Katharine: So Cheryl, you grew up in Minnesota going to church with your family, but it was more of a tradition that you did and you didn’t really believe Christianity or have its power.

Cheryl: Yeah, I didn’t understand what Christ’s sacrifice was about. I knew all the Bible stories, but I didn’t understand what they meant for me. When life got difficult, I turned my back on church and on God then made some pretty big mistakes. I became even more bitter against God. But then I met a man who wasn’t scared away by my life. In retrospect, I can see that he was showing me what the love of Christ was like. To make a long story short, he prayed for me, I accepted Christ, and then we got married.

Katharine: Let’s fast forward. Tell us about your trip to Africa.

Cheryl: I was in Uganda just over a year ago on a short-term mission trip. I had taught your Bible studies to children and had met a 5-year-old boy with Down Syndrome. That night I was asking one of the pastors about special needs children in Uganda and Africa which led to a discussion about abortion. The pastor said that he preaches on how our words often send women to have abortions. And that’s when I knew I needed to change the conversation about abortion.

Cheryl Krichbaum on the radioKatharine: So you realized that the way the church talks about abortion can be damaging to women? How should the conversation change?

Cheryl: The pro-life movement usually talks about babies, trying to convince the abortion-minded that killing babies is wrong–and it is wrong. But the pro-choice movement is talking about women and women’s rights, not babies. Women choose abortion because they think it’s best for themselves. We are ego-centric people and Millenials even more so. We need to have conversations about women and the psychological damage that results from abortion. If they are Christians, then we also need to talk about the spiritual darkness they plunge themselves into when they have abortions. We need to have loving conversations that draw women into life–physically and spiritually.

Katharine: So women-centered, eternally-focused conversations about abortion. I like that. This topic has a personal interest to you, doesn’t it?

Cheryl: Yes, when life got difficult and I left the church and God, I went looking for love elsewhere. I spent more time with my boyfriend than in my parents’ home because life was difficult at home but pleasant with my boyfriend. Not surprisingly, I got pregnant. Because I didn’t want the shame of pregnancy in high school and because I wanted to stay on track with my education, I had an abortion. And then I made more bad choices, like living with my boyfriend, buying a house with him, and eventually marrying him even though I knew deep inside that I shouldn’t have. That marriage ended in divorce. And, by the way, I still had the shame of pregnancy in high school, and my education was not completed on schedule.

Katharine: What a powerful personal story. And now you’re founding a ministry called My Body My Worship. How is your work different from what other pro-life groups do?

Cheryl: We battle abortion in a way different than all other pro-life ministries–through true worship and teaching the nations all that Jesus commanded (Romans 12:1, Matthew 28:20). We do this through women’s conferences and social media posts.

Our mission is to inspire spiritual acts of worship by teaching biblically sound science of sexual integrity and psychological effects of abortion–based on Romans 12:1-2 and 1 Corinthians 6:12-20.

Katharine: Michele, that’s where you come in. You’ve been a worshipper and a worship leader at your church for more than 20 years.

Michele: Yes, one thing I’ve learned in over 20 years of leading worship is that our bodies, souls, and spirits are intertwined. When we worship, it washes out our spirits and souls. It’s like taking a spiritual shower. All the filth and grime of the day washes off, and we’re filled with God’s presence.

Katharine: And you’ve named the ministry My body my worship? Why?

Cheryl: The pro-choice movement says, “My body. My choice.” We say that it’s our choice to worship with our bodies. As Michele says, our worship and our bodies are intertwined. There are many ways to worship–with hymns, on our knees, with lifted hands, even dancing. But the New Testament believer should also worship with their whole bodies in a Levitical sense, meaning that they should be pure before the Lord.

We get this from Romans 12:1, which says: Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.

Michele: We are also using worship as King Jehoshaphat in the Bible did to defeat his enemies. In 2 Chronicles 20, we see that the kingdom of Judah was about to be attacked by many enemies. King Jehoshaphat immediately went to the Lord. He called the country to pray and fast. Then he sent out a worship team ahead of the army. And GOD defeated their enemies.

Cheryl: We too are at war–spiritual war. Women (and men, but most obviously women) are under attack–even from other women. Women are fooled into thinking that abortion is no big deal. We are fooled into believing that we can have safe sex outside of marriage. We abort in order to avoid the shame of being caught pregnant out of wedlock, and then we hide our abortions because we are ashamed.

Katharine: A lot of people think of abortion as a political issue. But you don’t. Explain.

Cheryl: We don’t think God sees abortion as a political issue. When you embrace Daniel chapter 4, you can’t help but realize that God is in control of who is in office. I do believe that God is unhappy with His Christian nation legalizing abortion, so yes, we need to de-fund Planned Parenthood and reverse Roe v Wade.

But God is unhappy with our hearts and is waiting for us, for Christians, to act like Christ. The real victory in this spiritual war is saving eternal lives of abortion-minded women and men here in the United States and around the world. The Church is bigger than our country and so is spiritual war.

So, we’re going to battle by worshipping through music, lifted hands, etc. and by teaching what both the Bible and science say about abortion and about sex.

Katharine: That’s intriguing. Both the Bible and science.

Cheryl: Yes, both the Bible and science because scientific research supports all the biblical laws about sex–Which is no surprise, right? since God created science.

Katharine: Can you tell me just one thing scientific research has found that supports what the Bible says about sex and abortion?

Cheryl: The hormones that are activated in us when we have sex bond us with our partner. So when people have heterosexual or homosexual sex, they feel bonded to that person. The Bible says, the two shall become one, which is reiterated in 1 Corinthians 6:12-20. When women break that bond, their emotions are affected and often they become depressed or develop anxiety. When men break that bond, they often become jealous ex-boyfriends.

Katharine: Wow. So our bodies were physically designed to operate best when we make a marriage connection to just one person. Alright, shifting gears a little, I’d love to hear what you would say to a woman who has an unplanned pregnancy right now who is thinking about an abortion?

Cheryl: When I had my abortion, I plunged myself into darkness. Even before there was a TV show called “The Walking Dead,” I described myself as the walking dead. I looked alive. I acted happy. But I wasn’t. I was dead inside. When you choose death for what is growing inside of you, you also choose death for yourself and Satan wins. God loves you so much that He doesn’t want the pain of abortion for you.

Katharine: What would you say to a young woman thinking about having sex before getting married?

Michele: As young women, we were told it’s OK to have sex as long as you use birth control. Today they called it “safer” sex. But the Bible doesn’t say that it’s okay to have sex if we use birth control. God says the only way to fully experience the beauty that He made sex to be is to have it with just the one person of the opposite sex to whom you are married. In fact, sex outside marriage is so dangerous–both physically and spiritually–it can scar our bodies, emotions, and spirits forever. Until we ask Jesus to heal those wounds.

Cheryl: The biggest advantage of sexual purity, of course, is obeying God–this is your spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1) and your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19). When our spirits are pure, we can hear more clearly from the Lord and become like spiritual superheroes. Nothing is impossible for us spiritually. When we live with sin, it’s like Superman meets kryptonite. Sin drains our spiritual power. Sex outside of marriage makes us weaklings spiritually. We can’t hear God, and we can be easily defeated. Sexual purity gives us spiritual super-strength. It keeps our emotions free of deep wounds.

But it also keeps our physical bodies free of so many diseases. For example, HPV is so prevalent now that we have a vaccine for it. Women are biologically more susceptible to HPV than men and get it even if the condom works perfectly.

We need to change the conversation about abortion. We need to talk about abortion and sex more in church than in politics. We need to teach our generation and the generations after us. This is not a young person’s issue. This is a heart issue of all the generations. All the generations need healing. And in a 2 Chronicles 7:14 way, all generations need to repent and seek God’s face if we want revival–and we believe our conferences will spark revival.

Katharine: What about a woman who has already had an abortion, like yourself, Cheryl? What would you say to someone like you?

Cheryl: Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6). If we want life, if we want to stop being the walking dead, then we have to accept Jesus’ love for us. I chose Christ and then later admitted to Him that I was wrong to have an abortion. And He immediately washed away my sins, and I felt clean and alive. You can have that freedom, too. Start with Psalm 51 and then contact your local pregnancy center for a post-abortion healing class. You can also seek a healing ministry or attend one of our conferences.

Katharine: I’ve never had an abortion, but I lost two children in utero, so I understand the guilt and feelings of loss that we feel anytime we lose a pregnancy. And I can also tell you that our children are with God. I believe I will spend eternity with them. And they always have a place in our hearts. Their short lives served a purpose here even if they were never born.

Cheryl: Yes. And our babies love us and forgive us. They are in heaven waiting for their moms. And those babies whose moms do not know Christ are crying. We Christians have got to share the Gospel with post-abortive women so that those babies are consoled and reconciled some day with their mothers in heaven.

Katharine: Amazing work you’re both doing Cheryl and Michele. If someone wanted to find out more about your work, how could they do it?

Cheryl: Our website is MybodyMyworship.org. We’re also on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. We also do MybodyMyworship conferences at churches. You can find out information about how to get involved or how to bring a conference to your church on our website. We honestly believe that worshipping the Lord in this way will spark revival.

Katharine: It’s been a delight to have you on our show today.

Cheryl: Thank you for having us!

In Christ,

Cheryl

How Was Your Church’s Sanctity of Life Sermon?

Dear Christian Sisters,

January was Sanctity of Life Month. January 21st, specifically, was Sanctity of Life Sunday. What was Sanctity of Life Sunday like for you?

I know it was 2-1/2 weeks ago, which seems like a lifetime. But do you remember?

Many pastors across the United States preached on the Sanctity of Life. Mine did. His sermon was awesome.

But it was just a start.

I heard that a woman in our congregation changed from pro-choice to pro-life. Yay!

I heard that another woman said she was going home to her daughter, who is pregnant out of wedlock, and encouraging her to go through with the pregnancy whereas she had previously planned to promote abortion. YAY!

These are victories!

But they are just the start.

I went home simultaneously encouraged and disappointed.

I was encouraged because our pastor got so many things right.

  • He explained that God is the Creator of life, including the life of the pre-born.
  • He explained that God is both the judge of sin and the Savior for sinners!
  • He exhorted the church to go out and be the hands and feet of Jesus to love and serve women, men, and babies.

But that is just the start.

And so I was disappointed.

Until the Lord reminded me that He has lit a fire inside of me to get The Church to go even further. This is the mission the Lord has given me.

  • We, The Church, must talk more about abortion in the church than in politics—beyond Sanctity of Life Sunday.
  • We, The Church, must change the focus from saving the mortal lives of babies to saving the eternal lives of women and the men who get them pregnant. And when women choose to go through with the pregnancy, we need to focus on saving the eternal lives of those babies. The Great Commission tells us to do so (Matthew 28:19).
  • We, The Church, must teach sexual purity (Matthew 28:20)—because our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:12-20)—not leave sex education to the schools, TV, and social media (Deuteronomy 6:7).
  • We, The Church, must repent of our unwillingness to talk about abortion and sexual immorality.
  • We, The Church, must help women and men heal from abortion and sexual immorality.
  • We, The Church, must repent of its sexual sins in order to show God that we’re ready for revival (2 Chronicles 7:14).

What did you think of your pastor’s Sanctity of Life sermon? Post a comment below. And if you have a link to your pastor’s message, please include it!

I’ll put two links in the comments below, including a link to David Platt’s message.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Legalized Abortion & the Anniversary of Roe v Wade

Dear Christian Sisters,

Today, January 22nd, is the 45th anniversary of Roe v Wade.

Although I am heartbroken that our country has given in to satan’s* lies, let us not be deceived into thinking that reversing Roe v Wade will end abortion. It won’t.

Abortion is illegal in countries all over the world, yet the abortion rate is still high in those countries.

Uganda’s Abortion Rate

In Uganda, where abortion is illegal, the abortion rate is thought to be as high as 70%. What will change that?

Changing the abortion rate requires a societal change away from pre-marital sex, adultery, and tribal traditions of having multiple wives to following what the Bible says about sex—that is, only having sex with the one person whom you marry.

Cheryl preaching sexual integrity in Kigumba, Uganda
Crazy Hair Krichbaum, or as my mission-trip teammates called me, Chastity Krichbaum. Pic taken in Kigumba, Uganda January 3, 2018

The whole society has to change, and that change needs to begin within the church. For that very reason, I have been preaching sexual integrity in Uganda.

Now to do the same here in the United States. (New ministry beginning this year: MybodyMyworship, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.)

The Effects of Reversing Roe v Wade

More Needs in the United States

When (not if) we reverse Roe v Wade, the need to care for women will rise.

We will have more women in crisis pregnancy centers.

We will have more women in emergency rooms because women will go to unsafe doctors or take homemade concoctions that not only kill the babies but hurt themselves.

We will have more children in the foster care system.

We will also have more children born with disabilities.

Are you ready for that reality?

What are you doing through your church to get ready?

Further, you will have even more women angry at Christians because, from their perspective, we are putting them into bondage.

We need to stand firm. We need to convince them that we are protecting them from satan’s* bondage of lies and darkness.

Influencing the Abortion Rate Worldwide

Reversing Roe v Wade will also reduce the abortion rate worldwide.

Why? Because with legalized abortion, we are telling the rest of the world that abortion is okay. Despite their own laws, they are following our example.

Whether we like it or not, we are watched by the world. Whether we agree or not, we are perceived to be a Christian country.

Because we are perceived to be a Christian country, we are telling the rest of the world that Christ approves of abortion at any point in the pregnancy.

By restricting pro-abortion laws and eventually reversing Roe v Wade, we are telling the world that Christ is against abortion.

Simultaneously Pro-Active in Politics and Pro-Active in Our Communities

So let’s get ready. In politics:

Through your church:

The abortion rate is not going to change with us sitting here idly reading blog posts. Let’s get to work.

In Christ,

Cheryl

* I refuse to capitalize “satan.” He does not deserve the respect of a capitalized name.

Abortion: Changing the Conversation

Dear Christian Sisters,

I am Cheryl Krichbaum, a wife, a mom, a former web-based training project manager, a prayer warrior, and the founder of MyBodyMyWorship, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

I am an outspoken Christian, just telling it like it is. And I have a mission.

Cheryl Krichbaum

My mission is to change the conversation about abortion. Perhaps as a result, Christians will think and talk differently about abortion and then accomplish the Great Commission one hurting woman—and man—at a time.

I firmly believe that the pro-life movement is a Great Commission opportunity:

Rather than just pro-life, let’s be pro-eternal-life.

Why CherylKrichbaum.com?

Naming my website with my name rather than a created name for my ministry provides me the opportunity to write about whatever the Lord places on my heart, even if that’s something other than abortion and purity. For the foreseeable future, though, my posts will address those issues.

Naming my website CherylKrichbaum.com may seem arrogant to you, but for me it’s recognition that “Cheryl Krichbaum” is my Christian name, a name taken in humbleness and gratitude to my Father above.

Cheryl Krichbaum is my married name, the name I took when I married Russ. Just five months before we got married, I chose to have a personal relationship with Christ. That is, I changed from being a Christian by birth to a Christian by choice. I changed from being a hearer of The Word to a doer of The Word. I changed from being a Christian by title to a disciple of Christ.

Russ is my second husband. When I was married the first time (before I became a Christian), I did not change my name. So, until I married Russ (after I became a Christian), I had always had my birth name.

When Russ and I got engaged, I did not want to change my name. I remember that we argued about it. Russ felt emasculated, but I was offended, too. For me, it wasn’t about Russ. It was about wanting to feel valued for me.

Somewhere in those four months that we were engaged, the Lord softened my heart and made me realize that Hewas giving me a new name. So Cheryl Krichbaum not only is my married name, not only the name that I chose, but the name that reflects both Russ’ love for me and God’s love for me.

My Story Exchanged for His Story

You can read my story in the following blog posts: Faces of Abortion and Forgiveness and Peace that Passes All Understanding or watch my testimony on Facebook.

Someday you’ll be able to read many more details in my memoir, which I am editing and preparing for publication right now.

I Believe

I believe that we need to change the focus from babies who have no voice to women who are in charge of their own bodies. The pro-choice movement is all about the women, so we need to address their issues head on (know thy audience!). That’s what a true Aristotelian rhetorician would do. That’s what the Apostle Paul, a classical rhetorician, would do. That’s what we need to do, too.

We need to:

  • focus on saving eternal lives, not just mortal lives.
  • talk about abortion and sexual integrity more in church than in politics. Why? Because abortion is illegal in most countries throughout the world, yet the abortion rate in those countries is still very high. Yes, we need to de-fund Planned Parenthood. Yes, we need to reverse Roe v Wade. But we also need to understand that the law won’t change hearts. Only Christ can do that.
  • teach men, women, and children to be obedient to God’s rules about sex. Just think about how many fewer abortions would be “needed” if there were fewer crisis pregnancies.
  • repent over our own sexual sins and our own silence about abortion and sexual immorality.
  • help men and women heal from abortion so that they do not abort again and heal from sexual immorality so that they have sex only within marriage.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Abortion is Healthcare vs Abortion Causes Psychological Damage

Dear Christian Sisters,

Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood Director turned pro-life advocate, sent an email about billboards like this one in Cleveland, OH:

It’s disgusting.

I can’t afford billboards, but I can afford social media, which has the potential to reach far more people. So, I’m countering these billboards with social media “billboards.”

But unlike the pro-choice movement, I am making mine personal. Mine don’t say “abortion causes.” Mine focus on the women who have abortions–because abortion does not just affect the baby; it affects the woman. And if you want women to stop aborting, then you need to make the message about them.

If you are on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, please like and share my billboards @MyBodyMyWorship. Or send the images below via email.

Post-abortive women are more likely to become depressed. @MyBodyMyWorshipPost-abortive women are more likely to abuse alcohol. @MyBodyMyWorshipPost-abortive women are more likely to get addicted to drugs. @MyBodyMyWorshipPost-abortive women are more likely to have anxiety. @MyBodyMyWorshipPost-abortive women are more likely to commit suicide. @MyBodyMyWorshipPost-abortive women are likely to abort more than once. @MyBodyMyWorshipPost-abortive women live in spiritual darkness until they have Christ. @MyBodyMyWorship

In Christ,

Cheryl

MyBodyMyWorship—God’s Counter to “My body. My choice.”

Dear Christian Sisters,

It all came together in Uganda.

A year ago, I came home from Uganda, the Pearl of Africa, where I had been on my first short-term mission trip. While teaching the Bible to children, I met a 5-year-old boy with Down Syndrome. His left eye was closed, just his left eye.Ugandan boy with Down Syndrome

I was born with my left eye closed, too. But, even though my family had little money, we did have insurance, so I have had 4 surgeries to open the lid. (As a result, the lid doesn’t like to close any more, and I wink at everyone!)

I have boys with mild special needs, and I am in a small group of moms of special needs children.

Raising children isn’t easy. Raising a child with special needs is outright challenging.

I can’t imagine how challenging it is for that mother to raise a boy with Down Syndrome in a developing country where her son not only will never go to school but is thought to be a curse or demon possessed.

As I asked our pastors what happens to children with special needs, I was confronted by the horror of murder.

Often, African women who have children with obvious physical deformities will drop their children into a pit. And by pit, I mean an outhouse with no seat. A toilet. An African squatty potty.

In the U.S., we don’t wait until the child is born. If the results of the amniocentesis indicate Down Syndrome, we abort.

What’s the difference?
Size—The baby may be smaller.
Location—The baby is inside a womb instead of outside.

It’s still murder.

I asked whether abortion was legal in Uganda. No, it’s not legal. But women still abort.

Keep that in mind when you think about abortion as a political issue. Yes, we need to change the law. But the law doesn’t change hearts. Only Christ can do that.

One of the pastors on the mission trip went on to talk about one of his pet peeves—how we talk to our daughters sends them to abort. He preached there in Uganda against telling our daughters not to come home pregnant because when we say that, our daughters abort rather than shaming their families.

Is it really any different in the U.S.?

With that, I knew what the Lord was calling me to do. He was calling me to change the conversation about abortion.

Abortion: Changing the ConversationAs I’ve been speaking and blogging over the last year, the Lord gave me His vision for a new ministry. My friend and I have named it MyBodyMyWorship—all together because they are intertwined.MyBodyMyWorship

You may have seen the pro-choice movement called “My body. My choice.” MyBodyMyWorship is God’s counter-movement.

While again in Uganda over New Year’s, it all came together. I understood what the Lord wants MyBodyMyWorship to do—teach Christians what it means to worship Him in all ways:

  • Song
  • Lifting hands
  • Dance
  • Kneeling in reverence
  • Serving others

—just to name a few. But also to worship Him with our bodies:

Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.
Romans‬ ‭12:1‬ ‭NASB‬‬

Why Christians?

  • Because Christians need to get out of abortion clinics.
  • Because Christians need to obey Christ’s commands about sex.
  • Because people who say they are Christians need to become Christ followers.

So MyBodyMyWorship will teach:

  • What it means to worship God
  • The psychological effects of abortion
  • The biblical reasons to not abort
  • What science says about how we bond to our sex partners—all of them
  • The biblical reasons to have sex with only your spouse
  • How to heal from abortion and from sexual immorality

And will include:

  • Worship music
  • Testimonies
  • Prayer

based on Romans 12:1-2 and 1 Corinthians 6:12-20.

I had the opportunity to teach a shortened version while in Uganda, and it was well received. People are hungry for the truth.

Stay tuned for MyBodyMyWorship events.

Ask us to schedule an event at your church.

Follow @MyBodyMyWorship on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

In Christ,

Cheryl