The Consequences of Unconfessed Sin

Dear Christian Sisters & Brothers,

This is a continuation of The Spiritual Consequences of Abortion Series, which includes:

Today, we continue to how King David described the consequences of unconfessed sin.

Despite David’s efforts to cover up his sin, the fighting men seem to have figured out that David had Uriah killed given that Bathsheba’s father was one of the mighty men (2 Samuel 23:34; 11:3) and that her grandfather Ahithophel later conspired against David (2 Samuel 15:31).

Certainly, those working in David’s palace knew that David got Bathsheba pregnant (2 Samuel 11:3-4) and tried to fool Uriah (2 Samuel 11:8-10, 13).

Perhaps all the people in Jerusalem figured out David’s sins (because not all rumors are false) but were afraid to say anything.

Until Nathan confronts David, the king thinks he has gotten away with his sins of extra-marital sex and murder (2 Samuel 11:27).

David Confessed His Sins

After Nathan explains things, David immediately takes responsibility and confesses his sin (2 Samuel 12:1-13).

As you know, David sang nearly half the Psalms. I say sang because psalm means song. Did he write them before he sang them, or did he sing them and then write them down? We don’t know.

But after he takes responsibility for what he did, David goes into the Tent of Meeting and sings his confession, as recorded in Psalm 51.

He also sings Psalm 32. In Psalm 32, David elegantly described what happened while he had unconfessed sin:

When I kept silent about my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my vitality was drained away as with the fever heat of summer. I acknowledged my sin to You and my iniquity I did not hide. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord”; and You forgave the guilt of my sin. (Psalm 32:3-5 NASB, emphasis mine)

From Psalm 32 and from Psalm 51, we learn what happens when we murder and commit adultery:

  • When we keep silent about our sin, our bodies waste away (Psalm 32:3).
  • The Lord’s hand is heavy upon us (Psalm 32:4).
  • Our vitality is drained away (Psalm 32:4).
  • We yearn to hear joy and gladness again (Psalm 51:8).
  • We can’t wait for our broken bones to rejoice (Psalm 51:8).
  • We want to be renewed with a steadfast spirit (Psalm 51:10).
  • We want to feel the Holy Spirit within us (Psalm 51:11).
  • We want to be restored with the joy of salvation (Psalm 51:12).

More Holy Spirit!

Like King David, once we have confessed we can feel the Holy Spirit within us, and perhaps then other people will see that we have more fruit of the Spirit—

  • love
  • joy
  • peace
  • patience
  • kindness
  • goodness
  • faithfulness
  • gentleness
  • self-control (Galatians 5:22-23)

But there’s more! In Luke 11:13, Jesus gives us permission to ask for even more of the Holy Spirit.

Join me tomorrow when I connect the whole series, explaining how the story of David, Bathsheba, and Uriah relates to the spiritual consequences of abortion.

In Christ,

Cheryl

Cheryl Krichbaum’s Pro-Life Book Secures Top 10 Spot in Global Author Academy Awards

ReTested: The Story of a Post-Abortive Woman Called to Change the Conversation up against hundreds of authors worldwide for prestigious 2019 Author Academy Award

Press Release!retestedfinalistvote

ReTested, written by Cheryl Krichbaum, is a finalist for the 2019 Author Academy Awards, an honor bestowed for literary merit and publishing excellence in the writing and publishing industry.

Up for an award in the Memoir category, Krichbaum’s book tells her story of how she responds with increasingly better ways to the same family circumstance—or “test”—over 30+ years as well as how she sees the abortion conversation needs to change.

Endorsed by Abby Johnson and Kim Ketola, ReTested is the first in the Faces of Abortion Series.

“Hundreds of books from authors throughout the world are up for an Author Academy Award,” said Kary Oberbrunner, founder of Author Academy Elite. “Our goal is to help further connect this global community of authors, maintain excellence and integrity of the book publishing industry, and raise awareness that the stories being told and the authors who write them are worth our attention.”

Authors of all kinds—indie, traditional, and collaboratively published—are considered for the award in one of sixteen categories. Entries are reviewed and evaluated on popular vote, social contribution, and overall presentation (cover, content, flow, and originality) by the Academy’s voting membership comprised of best-selling authors, literary agents, and industry leaders.

If interested in supporting Krichbaum by participating in the popular vote, go to authoracademyawards.com and scroll to the “Ready to Vote?” section. Once there, click to the Memoir category, then click ReTested.

The top ten finalists in each category are invited to present their book at the Author Academy Awards Red Carpet Session on Friday, Oct. 25, 2019 in Columbus, Ohio. Winners will be announced later that evening at the Awards Ceremony where they will be invited to give an acceptance speech. Winners will receive:

  • The Academy Boon of Merit Award
  • Press release and media story created by a professional PR firm
  • A Private Recorded Coaching Session featuring a YouTube Consultant on how to leverage their book with video
  • Traditional Media and Social Media press including features on select podcasts, shows, vlogs, blogs, and articles
  • Lifetime access to 30 Days to a Bigger Stage Experience
  • The opportunity to present their book at the Igniting Souls Conference main stage

About the Author Academy Awards

The Author Academy Award is bestowed for literary merit and publishing excellence in the writing and publishing industry. It is presented annually by Author Academy Elite, a premium service provider for authors at the Author Academy Awards Ceremony.

More about ReTested & Author Cheryl Krichbaum

For more information about ReTested and author Cheryl Krichbaum, visit facesofabortion.com/retestedmedia.html

Listen to Alyssa Milano

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

On Sunday, Alyssa Milano told her abortion story on her podcast. Some news outlets reported on it, including the LA Times, Us Weekly, and FOX.

Rather than getting mad at her for justifying what she did (for I, too, had an abortion), let’s read what Alyssa actually said (which I transcribed from her podcost):

I was on the pill, taking birth control, because I knew that I was not ready to be a parent… Also, at that time, I was taking a drug called Accutane. Accutane is an acne medicine that is so likely to cause birth defects if taken by a pregnant woman that the FDA now requires doctors, pharmacists, and women to sign up to a registry before dispensing it. So using contraception was doubly important to me.

And I still got pregnant.

It was devastating. I was raised Catholic and was suddenly put in conflict with my faith, faith I was coming to realize empowered only men to make every single decision about what was allowed and what was not allowed…

I chose to have an abortion I chose. It was my choice. And it was absolutely the right choice for me. It was not an easy choice. It was not something I wanted, but it was something that I needed, like most health care is.

I refuse to let anyone else’s bullshit morality force me into a life of premarital celibacy. I refuse to live in the narrative that sexual pleasure is for men and that women exist to deliver that pleasure. My body gives me pleasure. Sexually connecting with my partner gave me pleasure. No one would say that he was at fault for enjoying sex with me, but you can be damn sure that the men enacting these laws think less of me for deriving the same pleasure from him…

They tell you that the pill is 99% effective at preventing pregnancies and yet [here, she let’s out a big sigh] a few months later, I found out that I was pregnant again. So, I had done what I knew to do to prevent pregnancy and was still pregnant. So once again, I made the right decision to end that pregnancy…

The assault against women’s bodies has forced me to reflect on what I would’ve lost if I never had my abortions. I would not have my children… I would not have my career… I would never have met my amazing husband David… I would never have been free to be myself… That’s what this freedom is about: freedom. Freedom from oppression. Freedom for women to have the audacity to be equally sexual beings as men. freedom for women to live the life they were meant to have not just the life that is thrust upon them by a pregnancy that cannot exist in their life.

Listening to Alyssa tell her story is heartbreaking for me because…

  • I hear the pain in her voice.
  • I hear her regret for being pregnant and her regret of being faced with a choice.
  • I hear her anger toward patriarchy and inequality and hypocrisy.
  • I hear her heartbreak that she was twice in the 1% of birth control failure when she expected to be in the 99%.
  • I hear the anger for Christianity, which she sees as favoring men.

It’s heartbreaking to hear because I once thought like she does.

Regret about Pregnancy

I remember that I was more upset about being pregnant and having to choose than I was about the abortion itself. I blamed everyone else for my pregnancy rather than taking responsibility for choosing to have sex, which exists for procreation (whether you believe in creationism or evolution).

So, I was mad that sex did what it was supposed to do—make babies.

Do you hear that from Alyssa, too? What does that tell you about our sex education programs?

Inequality & Hypocrisy

When I hear Alyssa’s anger at inequality and hypocrisy, I want to cheer her on! Why? Because men are historically seen as studs when they get women pregnant, but women pregnant out-of-wedlock have been seen as whores. That hypocrisy makes me mad.

The reality is that men can have sex with multiple women with little consequence compared to the consequences for women. Women are at much higher risk for STIs/STDs because they are on the receiving end.

Women are the ones who get pregnant while men can walk away—and many men do, and many men have. Then the woman has to find him and fight for financial support.

If he’s not a nice guy, then she has to hide to protect herself and her child.

If she’s not interested in him any more, then she doesn’t want a child to keep her forever connected to him.

For the pro-choice movement, abortion is an equality issue. Alyssa says it in her podcast. The guests she quoted in her podcast say it. Can you see why?

Men have hurt women. Men have a reputation for hurting women, not protecting them.

So, when Alyssa and others in the pro-choice movement see male legislators writing anti-abortion laws, she does not see them as protecting her but as hurting her in yet another way.

What’s the answer?

One answer is for men to improve their reputation.

Oh, how I would like to hear a male, pro-life politician apologize for all the men who have not stood up to their responsibilities and to call for men to do better.

Men who are good men need to be mentoring other men—of every age. They need to be good dads to their sons and daughters. They need to teach their sons and especially their daughters what to look for in a spouse and what to watch out for when dating.

Women who are married to good men need to be heralding their husbands to their children and their friends publicly so that society hears that there are good men out there.

I’ll start! Russ is an awesome provider who would never run away from his children. Actually, Russ would have chosen to stop after our first was born because he felt too old to have our second one, but he never considered aborting. Today, our second boy is a chip off the old block. They truly enjoy their relationship.

(Follow Love Harder Marriage Coaching for more positive stories about husbands and fathers.)

Equality or Bondage?

The irony is that Alyssa and my former self see premarital sex and abortion as an equality issue, but I now see premarital sex and abortion as a bondage issue.

Roe v Wade was decided by men. What does legalized abortion allow? It allows men to have more extra-marital sex without consequences of providing for their children.

  • The baby daddy is the number one influence on a woman’s choice to abort.
  • Fathers, even Christian fathers, bring their daughters to abortion clinics.
  • Abusers bring women to abortion clinics.
  • Men bring their underage girlfriends to abortion clinics.
  • Sex traffickers bring women to abortion clinics.

That’s not equity. That’s bondage.

If we want abortion to be unthinkable, then we need to be talking to men, influencing men, to do better. I’m a mother of two boys. I’m starting at home.

Hollywood

Here’s another irony in what Alyssa has to say. At the time of her abortions, Alyssa was on the “women-empowering” show Charmed. She was one of three female stars of the TV series, which was created by a woman.

If Hollywood executives had written her out of the series for being pregnant, wouldn’t we have screamed women’s oppression? and inequality in the workplace?

Alyssa’s boyfriend/fiance—whom she did not call out, but I will: Scott Wolf—certainly had the money to support their child. She had enough money to raise their child or to put their baby up for adoption. So what was the concern?

The concern is that Alyssa’s career would’ve been ruined.

Don’t be surprised by this. Hollywood was paying for / providing abortions to actresses long before Roe v Wade.

Further, Lisa Whelchel, a Christian, who was on the TV show “The Facts of Life” (1979-88) talked about how she was given a scale and expected to weigh in every day. Skinniness is not just expected but demanded in Hollywood. Pregnancy messes that up.

In contrast, Gal Gadot, who played “Wonder Woman” in the recent DC Extended Universe movie, filmed several scenes while pregnant. Note that she had a female director.

But I wonder if Alyssa has ever talked to Taraji P Henson, who didn’t let her toddler or her status as a single mother stop her from becoming a multiple award winning actress.

“What if I believed those people who told me when I became pregnant in college that I wouldn’t finish? I walked across that stage with my son on my hip.” ~Taraji P. Henson, “Empire” and “Hidden Figures”

1% not 99%

I hear Alyssa upset that both of her unwanted pregnancies were from the 1% ineffectiveness of the pill.

This makes me wonder if Alyssa ever took math. I wonder if so many people in the pro-choice movement took math. I wonder how I was so blind when I was pro-choice.

The thinking is that we did everything to prevent pregnancy, so why are we pregnant? But we didn’t do everything to prevent pregnancy because if we had, we wouldn’t be pregnant. What? What’s that? It’s called abstinence.

Women and men, don’t be surprised if you’re having sex and get pregnant. It’s called biology.

Patriarchy & the Church

Did you notice that Alyssa looks at the Catholic church, and therefore the Pope, as male oppression? The same could be said of Protestant churches that do not allow female pastors. This is certainly how I felt.

Again, I find this ironic, because if Christians were actually not having sex outside of marriage, then Alyssa wouldn’t think that what Pope Paul VI said in Humanae Vitae (1968) or what Pope John Paul II said in Theology of the Body (1979-1984) favored men rather than women.

And no, I’m not Catholic.

When the Holy Spirit first tapped on my shoulder (on my first Uganda mission trip) about speaking boldly about abortion, I had just said to two male pastors, “Women don’t want to hear this message from men. You don’t understand. There’s no way you can understand. Women need to hear from women.”

So, we women need to speak up. And when we do, we need to be clear that we have not been convinced by “male oppressors” but instead by scientific research.

And men, you need to talk to men because their influence is much larger than the pro-choice movement is willing to admit. Teach men to be men, to step up, to provide, to be responsible, to father well.

Sex is the responsibility of both men and women.

  • Both have a choice.
  • Both are smart enough to realize that even 1% ineffectiveness can result in pregnancy.
  • Both have a responsibility to provide for the child they helped to create.

Me Too, Alyssa. Sorry, Not Sorry.

Alyssa ended her podcast saying, “I, for one, will never stop using my voice. Sorry, not sorry.”

Yeah, me too, Alyssa—not that I have your pretty face, your slim figure, or your Hollywood credentials, for I am just a woman who listens to both sides, discusses rather than rants, reasons with others out of love rather than self-justification, and who votes her values.

I vote for abundant life not just for babies, but for women.

My body. My choice. It’s my body, and with it I will worship the Lord.

MybodyMyworshipBROWN

In Christ,

Cheryl

P.S. The video at the top of the FOX news article is from May 2019 and is demeaning—please don’t applaud FOX or Tucker Carlson for that awful interview with Mark Steyn. We don’t win this battle by belittling but through love.

Abortion Hurts Women Spiritually

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

This headline makes me so angry! No wonder so many women in The Church abort—they are not hearing the truth!

36% of women who abort go to church at least once per month (Care-Net 2016).

Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of Christ. (Romans 10:17 NASB)

So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32 ESV)

As a post-abortive woman myself, let me explain what abortion does to women spiritually.

I have yet to hear the following message in any Sanctity of Life sermon, but every woman and man needs to hear it.

God is Holy, and He Hates Sin

God has set standards for how we are to live, not because He wants to control us or take away our fun but because He loves us as a perfect Father does.

Now, we do not have perfect fathers here on earth, and many of you have broken relationships with your imperfect fathers. I realize that our broken view of fatherhood makes it difficult to see God as a loving Father, but perhaps you can imagine with me.

Anyone remember the TV show Leave It to Beaver? Remember how the father worked hard, provided for his family, and loved his wife and his boys?

How about the father in the Brady Bunch?

My Three Sons?

How about Liam Neeson’s character in the “Taken” series of movies? Clearly he’s imperfect but fiercely protective of his virgin daughter.

God, as Our Father, Creates Standards for Us Because He Loves Us

God is love. (1 John 4:8)

From the Old Testament to the New, God removed the food standards (all the standards for eating kosher foods), but He did not remove the moral standards. We can read these moral standards in the 10 Commandments and other places.

Jesus reiterated the 10 Commandments by telling His Jewish audience to love God and love people.

When our parents create boundaries for us—or standards—we know that if we do not follow their rules, we will experience consequences, such as a time-out when we’re little or losing privileges when we’re teenagers.

God, our loving Father, taught parents to create standards because that’s what He does. We are to reflect His fatherhood. We are imperfect people and therefore imperfect parents (just ask my boys), so we do not reflect God perfectly, but we are called to try.

God’s standards include keeping sex within marriage and not murdering. (Before you get mad at me, remember that I have not kept either of these standards.)

If you need a reminder of the Bible verses that show these standards, see the links below to my other websites:

Best Pro-Life Bible Verses

Bible Verses on Sexual Immorality

So, what happens when we break God’s standards? I think the best example is to look at King David’s life.

David and Bathsheba

David’s whole story shows us a man of great faith (God calls Him a man after His own heart [Acts 13:22]) but also a man of a great imperfections.

Let’s look at what happens to David when he does not keep sex within marriage and then murders to cover his sin.

You are probably familiar with David and Bathsheba’s story, but let me give you a quick reminder. The short version is that David used his kingly power to have sex with another man’s wife and then killed the man to cover up his sin (see 2 Samuel 11).

Today in the United States, you might expect a rich man to offer his mistress money for an abortion or even pressure her into having an abortion. But that’s not what David does.

Why not? Because the Hebrews valued babies.

Until Nathan confronts David, the king thinks he has gotten away with his sin of extra-marital sex and of murder.

After Nathan explains things, David immediately takes responsibility and confesses his sin (see 2 Samuel 12).

The Spiritual Consequences of Murder and Adultery

David then goes into the Tent of Meeting and sings his confession, as recorded in Psalm 51. He also sings Psalm 32. From these two Psalms, we learn what happens when we murder and commit adultery:

  • When we keep silent about our sin, our bodies waste away. (Ps 32:3)
  • The Lord’s hand is heavy upon us. (Ps 32:4)
  • Our vitality is drained away. (Ps 32:4)
  • We yearn to hear joy and gladness again. (Ps 51:8)
  • We can’t wait for our broken bones to rejoice. (Ps 51:8)
  • We want to feel the Holy Spirit within us. (Ps 51:11)
  • We want to be renewed with a steadfast spirit. (Ps 51:10)
  • We want to be restored with the joy of salvation. (Ps 51:12)

Why do we desire the Holy Spirit? Because when we have more of the Holy Spirit, we have more fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Gal 5:22-23).

In my memoir, ReTested, I explain my 14 or so years between my abortion and my confession as walking through life dead inside. I called myself “the walking dead” before there was a TV show by that name!

Pastoral Leadership

So, Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, Presbyterian, and United Church of Christ pastors in Tennessee, when you tell women that it’s okay to abort, you are telling them that it’s okay to live separated from God, that God doesn’t mind that they murdered, that it’s okay to walk around like zombies.

The truth is that Jesus came to set us free (Galatians 5:1) and so that we can have abundant life (John 10:10). Abortion does not result in abundant life. It results in drained vitality (Psalm 32:4; John 10:10).

Your letter to Tennessee Gov. Bill Lee is not the kind of leadership we women deserve. We deserve to be:

  • taught the truth (John 8:31-32; Acts 17:10-11).
  • gently rebuked like Nathan gently rebuked David (2 Samuel 12) and Jesus gently rebuked the woman at the well (John 4:4-42) and the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11).
  • taught the path to renewed vitality (Matthew 6:12-15) so that we can live abundantly (John 10:10).

Further, for those women who do not believe that Jesus is the Christ who died for our sins (Romans 5:8), was raised from the dead (Romans 10:9-10), and today sits at the right hand of God, you are telling them that it’s okay to be forever separated from their babies and spend eternity separated from God.

And just to appeal to the practical nature of running your local church, if you want women to serve in the church, get them freed from their sins.

Freedom Is Available, and It’s Awesome!

If you have been involved in an abortion—whether you had one yourself or “supported” a woman through one—you can have your vitality renewed, like I did.

The path to renewed vitality is confession (Matthew 6:12, 14-15) and returning to God (John 8:11).

We protestants do not spend enough time talking about the benefits of confession. Let me just tell you from my own experience that confession and forgiveness results in freedom and abundant life!

And freedom is awesome!

Post-Abortion Healing Is Available!

Post-abortion healing classes are offered through pregnancy centers and some churches using curricula like Surrendering the Secret and Forgiven and Set Free. The Catholic Church offers Project Rachel.

Men who have pressured a woman, drove her to the clinic, or paid for the abortion need healing, too. Some pregnancy centers offer classes for them as well. A common curriculum is Healing a Father’s Heart.

The links to books above are affiliate links. Any remuneration that I receive from affiliate links are used to pay for my three websites: CherylKrichbaum.blog, MybodyMyworship.org, and FacesofAbortion.com. Please contact me if you have any questions.

In Christ,

Cheryl

My Joy Was Sucked Out

Dear Christian Sisters and Brothers,

This is what abortion does to women. What’s worse is that we don’t even realize it until we’re healed and looking back at our lost years.

Thankfully, post-abortion healing is available. Spread the word!

Contact your local pregnancy center or Surrendering the Secret.

06-sucked_blog

I hope you’ll join me next Friday on Facebook Live or YouTube Live at 7 pm Eastern Time. Be sure to forward this email to your pro-life Christian friends.

Not only will the event help you with your abortion conversations, but the book will provide you with a good read for Holy Week.

You can pre-order ReTested: The Story of a Post-Abortive Woman Called to Change the Conversation on Amazon and Barnes & Noble in hard cover, soft cover, or ebook. (Audio will be released later.)

In Christ,

Cheryl

People, Not Politics: Introduction to ReTested Book

Dear Christian Sisters,

This morning I promised to send you the introduction to my first book, ReTested: The Story of a Post-Abortive Woman Called to Change the Conversation.ReTested book cover

The book is due out Friday, April 12th, so put that date on your calendar and RSVP for the online event.

When I sat down to write the Introduction, I actually wrote more than what I published. But God made it clear that the second half were my words rather than the words that He gave me. So, I ended the introduction before I got on my pedestal. Here it is:

Introduction to ReTested

It breaks my heart that my pro-life stance automatically associates me with the Republican party.

Simultaneously, it breaks my heart that politicians in the Democratic party vote pro-choice or get bullied out of their elected positions. Why should I contact my legislator if he or she has already decided to vote pro-choice no matter what his or her constituents say? Our political system is supposed to represent its people, not money-making companies like abortion clinics and pharmaceutical companies.

Ever since we’ve seen the pre-born on ultrasound machines in the 1970s, we have known scientifically that they are alive. Science shows that they are alive. Our laws acknowledge the value of pre-born eagles and pre-born sea turtles but not the value of pre-born humans. Our thinking is backwards. Our political system is broken.

But even when we overturn Roe v Wade and every other pro-choice law in each of the states, abortion will continue. It’ll go underground. We’ll have a new illegal drug trade. There are countries all over the world where abortion is illegal yet abortion continues. Don’t expect the United States to be any different.

If we want to end abortion, we must change hearts. This starts with The Church. We have a lot to repent for (2 Chronicles 7:14a). We have a lot of disciples to make (Matthew 28:19). We have a lot of teaching to do (Matthew 28:20). All three are necessary if we expect God to hear from heaven, forgive our sin, and heal our land (2 Chronicles 7:14b).

“and My people who are called by My name humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” (2 Chronicles 7:14 NASB)

“Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:19-20 ESV)

In Christ,

Cheryl